Paper Castles

Kids are weird

2010-11-18T14:55:00.002-06:00

The other day we were all in the car, chatting about sledding. At the same time, Brad and I thought of the same memory from about 5 years ago...
We went sledding at the elementary school and half way down the hill, Jaimen flew off his sled and landed on his face and cried like it was ripped off (I really don't think the pain was that bad but I'm guessing it scared the ba-jonks out of him).
Much to our surprise, Jaimen didn't remember this. Mr Steal Trap Memory Kid did not recall this happening at all. Mr Remember When I Was 4 And I Got Stung By A Bee At The Pool didn't have one ounce of recollection of this event.
What does this all mean? Nothing really, I just thought it was weird.

JSC
PS Coming back to life is crazy yo.

RIP Paper Castles

2010-02-10T08:02:00.000-06:00

Sorry friends...

JSC

I almost don't want to share this...

2010-01-15T07:29:00.004-06:00

But really, it's too creepy not to. And I feel like if I write it or talk about it I'll be admitting that it happened, and that I wasn't delusional. Just to forewarn you, its really really really is creepy.
Ok, so, yesterday a co-worker told me about a movie he saw called Paranormal Activity. He said on a scale of 0 to creepy, he rated it creepy. He told me about a couple of scenes and I got really freaked out. Because I'm a true believer of shit like this. I tried my hardest to get the stuff he said out of my head but I kept going back to it, thus making me very jumpy the remainder of the day. So I thought that maybe me being on the edge made me believe that the following happened, but I don't think I can mistake this. My eyes are welling up with tears just thinking about it (which proves how scary it is because the only time my eyes well up with tears and I'm not crying is when I get freaked out, kinda like some people getting goose bumps)...
Chloe has this thing attached to her car seat handle. It's a butterfly that has a chime thing in it to keep her busy. So every time she grabs it or the car seat moves, the little butterfly makes this noise, like a wind chime. Last night I went to bed around nine and woke up at 130am. Not sure why I woke up, but I did. Nothing made me wake up, I just woke up. Husband was next to me, soundly sleeping. I looked at the clock and at the same I did, I heard the chime. I'm like...what the fuck?....I must be sleeping. But no, I was awake and now that I heard the chime again, I was WIDE awake. I tried to wake husband to no avail (he sleeps like a rock and is impossible to wake). I tried to go back to sleep and blame the noise on something else, but I kept hearing it. Being as Chloe's room is right next to ours and that's where her car seat sits, I tried to place the noise somewhere else, like outside, but no. It was coming from her room. Now I feel like I'm going to cry because I can still hear the chime chiming. It's not faint. I can't sorta hear it. I can hear it plain as day. I get a hold of myself and think more logically, it must be the cat. Yes, that's it, it's our big dummy cat playing with her car seat toy. That makes sense. Our cat loves playing with her toys. I've seen him do it dozens of times. I look over at the foot of our bed and much to my dismay, big dummy cat is curled up snoring away. DAMN. Well, if it's not the cat, it must be Super Kid. He's been known to do weird things in his sleep, maybe he's in there playing with it (this is 2am scared shitless logic, work with me). I try to wake Husband up again but he won't wake up. So I did the one thing in scary movies that I never understood, I got up to see if J was in there playing with her car seat toy. As I'm getting up I hear it again. Shit, what am I doing??? I turn on our bathroom light, then the hallway light and peak in her room where I see the edge of the car seat. My heart is beating out of my chest and I really feel like I'm going to faint but I am convinced that I will see J sitting in there half sleeping playing with the little butterfly. I slowly open her door only to find NOTHING.
There was nothing in there. No cat, kid, husband, nothing. I check on Chloe and she's snoozing away, not a care in the world. I look at her car seat and the toy was there, right where it was as I left it. It didn't even look like it had moved an inch.
I go back to bed and I can't sleep. I keep waiting to hear the stupid chime. After at least an hour I managed to fall back to sleep but I can't shake the absolute creepy feeling. I know this happened, I know I heard it, it wasn't a dream. But what was it? I'm not sure I want to know...

Creeeeeeeepy,
JSC

I fail

2010-01-11T13:41:00.003-06:00

We got home from going out to eat on Friday and I was fuller than full of spicy chicken. Albeit completely satisfied I felt a little guilty. I mean, I was eating really really really good for a long time. With the exception of the last month of my pregnancy, I ate lots of fruits and veggies and took my vitamins like a good girl and even drank milk for crying out loud for a YEAR.
Anyway, we get home and husband says he needs to go to the store real quick. I thought it was weird but whatever.
He leaves and is back in like 15 minutes and what does he have in tow?
A 12 pack of my old best friend Mountain Dew.
I'm like Hey what's that? (no I didn't, I said What the Fuck is that?).
He goes I got you a present and smiles so genuinely my heart skipped a beat.
I tried not to get mad, but I did a little. Now I have to find the will power not to drink the shit. Because if I have just one, I will start slipping back into a can of MD a day habit and that's just wrong.
What do you think I did?

JSC

Damn you Caribou!

2010-01-06T09:43:00.002-06:00

So I rewarded myself with coffee yesterday. That delicious coffee that tasted so good that I felt the need to guzzle it. Then two hours later for lunch I had a blueberry muffin and Frito's. An hour after that I was thirsty so I had a Dr Pepper with a granola bar. About 10 minutes later I started feeling extremely nauseous. And my right boobie, not ok. I did some Googling and found that sometimes people get flu like symptoms while weaning because their ducts get clogged but then the clog works itself out and all is well again.
So not sure but one of a few things are happening: I might sick, pregnant, experiencing clogged ducts or I'm just an idiot that ingested more sugar than necessary after a 3 month break from junk food.

Vomit,
JSC

Blinded by the light

2009-12-29T13:41:00.007-06:00

5 days until I am done hating life at 4 hour 10 minute intervals.
5 days until I can casually snack on a chocolate bar, cookie or skittle.
5 days until I can exercise without worrying about the repercussions of sweating too much and leaking everywhere.
5 days until I never have to utter the words 'pump and dump' after drinking a glass or two of wine.
5 days until I can happily drink wine with my sausage, green pepper and onion pizza.
5 days until I don't have to wake up in the middle of the night with big sore boobies that are hard as rocks and ready to burst.
5 days until I don't have to lug the stupid machine back forth with me where ever I go.
5 days until I don't have to lift my shirt up in the bathroom at work and get super fucking cold.
5 days until I can eat the spiciest of spicy foods (look out BDubs).
5 days....oh the glory of it all.

Wishing I had a time machine,
JSC

Merry Christmas

2009-12-22T11:17:00.001-06:00

I hope this comes out the right way

2009-12-17T12:50:00.003-06:00

I've been thinking a lot lately about where I'm suppose to be.
Am I suppose to be a Mom?
Am I suppose to live in this house?
Am I suppose to have this job?
This has all come full circle in the past few weeks where I've come to realize that yes, this is exactly where I'm suppose to be. That every single solitary decision I have made has led me to this place right here.
But then this led me to question why? Why am I in this place right here right now? Is it for a bigger reason that I don't know about?
Like what if I decided to not go online that one night while babysitting sisters kids and poke around on that Internet dating website and had that one fleeting little 'why not' moment and sign up? If I hadn't, I never would have met Husband. Would I have met him in some other capacity? But if I didn't, I wouldn't have perfect daughter right now. Isn't that weird? That one little tiny decision led me to her.
And that could be the answer of why. Why am I here? Because if I wasn't here, then I wouldn't have her. And maybe she is going to bring me someone else in the far off future that will impact my life in some grand way. I guess it's a little bit of a snowball effect.
So, it is a little early for New Years resolutions, but I think I know mine already (and this could just be life teaching me an odd lesson of revelations after 33 years): I am going to be confident in every decision I make. I am not going to question it because it will lead me to things that are suppose to happen.
Yes, that's what I'm going to do.

Clearly,
JSC

Tragic Morning (aka the morning where everything went wrong and then some)

2009-12-15T10:45:00.002-06:00

4:40am: Perfect daughter starts squawking. Lay in bed and wait for it to stop. It doesn't.
4:45am: Decide that perfect daughters bedroom floor is the best place to lay down and wait for perfect daughter to launch pacifier out of mouth and start crying like I've never fed her before.
5:00am: The crying begins.
5:10am: Feed daughter. Notice that there is a small black thing in her bottle. Worry excessively that it is a fruit fly. Pretend it's not there knowing that in a couple of years she will be eating dirt and maybe a worm or two.
5:30am: Feeding ends, diaper changed and now I must pump. Plop daughter in car seat because I need an audience.
5:31am: Hook myself up to the stupid machine and turn it on. It doesn't turn on. What the fuck stupid machine? Why aren't you working? Turn off and on about 50 times.
5:35am: Realize I don't have it plugged in. Hate the machine even more.
5:45am: Done pumping. What's that smell? Ah gawd perfect daughter pooped.
5:47am: The poop manages to smear up daughters back, down one leg and foot.
5:50am: Clean up daughter with baby wipes and change outfit.
6:00am: Shower time for me. Put squeaky clean daughter back in car seat and bring her in the bathroom with me.
6:01am: I step into shower and she starts crying. Naturally.
6:02am: For lord knows what I reason I step out of the shower and try to search for daughters pacifier while dripping all over the place. Find pacifier behind her ear after searching under each arm and butt area.
6:10am: Perfect daughter actually falls asleep while I'm blow drying my hair. Nice!
6:20am: Start the car because it's 5 below outside. Declare hatred for Minnesota winters once again.
6:30am: Buckle blissfully sleeping daughter in car seat. Wait a minute, why is she all wet? FUCK. I got her all wet trying to find her pacifier in the shower.
6:31am: Change outfit again and now perfect daughter is screaming at me because she was sleeping and now she's not.
6:35am: In the car finally!
6:45am: Arrive at daycare. Start to panic because I can't find pacifier.
6:50am: (yes a full five minutes later) Realize pacifier is in my hand.
6:51am: As I scurry up to the door I step in dog poop. I'm not kidding.
7:00am: Leave daycare hoping and praying that I make it to work without running over Bambi.

Like I have said dozens of times before, I couldn't make this shit up if I tried.

JSC

The full version is best

2009-12-11T09:34:00.000-06:00

Listen,

JSC

To My Husband

2009-12-01T10:47:00.003-06:00

JSC

Why I hate...

2009-11-23T11:54:00.001-06:00

My breastpump:

It's messy

I'm not trying to be positive so you can stick your sunshine up your ass,
JSC

Buzz Kill

2009-11-11T08:47:00.002-06:00

I have to go back to work tomorrow.

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo,
JSC

Another confusing exchange

2009-11-05T17:07:00.004-06:00

Last night at the dinner table, the following conversation took place between J and I (remember, J is 9 years old)

J: Mom, have you ever used acid?
Me: Oh my gawd, WHAT?
J: You know, acid? Like, when you were in college or before you had me?
Me: What are you talking about? Where did you hear about this?
J: My teacher. She told me she did when she was in college.
Me and Husband simultaneously: WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?
J: Acid. Like in your Chemistry class or somethin'? We learned all about it in Science today. Did you know that there is acid in vinegar?
Me (thankful that my sweet little boy and his teacher aren't talking about hallucinogenic drug use): No buddy, I didn't know there was acid in vinegar. Go on...

Baffling, isn't it?
JSC

To: Those Guys who wrote the handbook for my breast pump

2009-11-03T07:37:00.002-06:00

Dear Sirs (because there is no way a woman wrote this manual):
Your handbook is crap. Total crap. You keep repeating the phrase 'using your breast pump should not be uncomfortable' and I would like to declare that utter and complete bull shit. I am here to let all of you know that it is uncomfortable. There is nothing enjoyable about it (and YES I know that breast milk is best and it is designed especially for your child yadda yadda yadda HUSH). It feels like someone is giving you a titty twister repeatedly for however long you can endure the pain. Remember titty twisters? I didn't until I started using this thing. The last time I got a titty twister was before I had noted titty's and I think it was my sister who doled them out and it hurt, like a lot. Why don't you mention how to take the stupid tubes off your boobs without making a complete mess? Hmmmmm? I don't see that mentioned anywhere in your brightly colored instructions! I go from getting a boob squeeze for 15 minutes trying to pretend that whatever is on TV is really really interesting to taking the tubes off my boobs and having little droplets of boob milk land on my tummy or run down my sides. I couldn't figure out why my daughter got so upset every time I put her down and I figure it's probably because to her, I smell like food. Putting her in her crib just pisses her off because I smell like a walking candy isle to her. Not cool people, not cool at all.
Please re-write your manual with testimonials from people like me so then at least the consumers will know what they are getting into. Thanks.
Sincerely,
JSC

BAM! Bitches

2009-11-02T18:43:00.003-06:00

I stepped on the scale today and I only have 8 more pounds to lose to get back to my pre-Chloe weight!

hahahhahahhahahhahahaa

BAM!,
JSC

Sleeeeeepy

2009-10-31T09:24:00.003-05:00

My days

2009-10-22T17:39:00.004-05:00

Here is a little preview of how my days have been since the arrival of Ms Chloe:

2am: My 'shift' with Chloe starts
2:01am: Chloe starts crying so I feed her, burp her, change her diaper (usually twice because you can't poo in an already dirty diaper-you have to wait until the clean one is on)
2:40am: Chloe smiles in her full tummy haze and I don't care about the diaper episodes
2:50am: Chloe falls asleep
3:00am: Shit, time to pump
3:15am: Done pumping
3:15-4:30am: I try to doze off on the couch. Most of the time this doesn't happen because Chloe plays a game where she wants her pacifier but it falls out because she wants to cram her hand in her mouth instead and this wakes her, causes mass hysteria. We play this game until her next feeding
4:30am: Feed Chloe (see 2:01am routine)
5:00am: Fuck, time to pump again
5:20am: Decide it doesn't really make sense to try to go to sleep, so I just stay awake and watch Good Morning America or the Today Show
7:00am: Feed Chloe
7:50am: J comes upstairs, time to feed him breakfast. Whew, easy stuff. Cereal or oatmeal. Hope that he is not crabby. Oops, that was dumb. He's always crabby in the am.
8:00am: Try to shove J out the door in 10 minutes but he's complaining about something. Give him granola bar. Ahhhhh....he's all better.
8:10am-3:00pm: Try to do stuff inbetween pumping, feeding Chloe, checking e-mail (and FB Hello?!?! I do have priorities!), remembering what day it is, taking a walk, returning phone calls (doesn't ever happen), sort the giant pile of mail on my desk and breathe.
3:01pm: Shit, did I pump? Eat lunch? Get the mail?
3-6pm: Feed Chloe, eat dinner. Oh crap, I didn't take a shower. Oh well.
6-7pm: I don't know.
7pm: My shift ends. Night night. Well, this is suppose to be my bed time, but I have to pump again. Blasted!
8pm: k, now it's bed time. Oh look, The Real Housewives of Atlanta is on. Must watch.
9pm: Seriously, I'm going to bed now. See you at 2am.

I should be more tired but I'm just not, or maybe I am,
JSC

This just in

2009-10-14T14:15:00.001-05:00

I received a bill for my daughter's stay at the spa hospital.
$18,254.46.
Donations gladly accepted.

Gasp,
JSC

Spa Hospital

2009-10-13T16:31:00.005-05:00

I've thought about this post for a couple of days now and I think I've come up with a good way to fill you in on the details of my labor experience without going into too much detail.
Really, there aren't too many gruesome details to explore in the first place. I mean, there was blood, and a lot of it, but there wasn't any screaming or punching or fighting with nurses or doctors. Basically, it was just time. And lots of it. Lots and lots and lots and lots of waiting around for my body to kick it into high gear. I'd say the first 15 out of 21 hours (yes I said 21) I was at the hospital, was just a big waiting game.
Call me crazy, but my experience all and all was kinda like going to the spa. The nurses were always asking if I needed anything (can you say endless supply of peanut butter toast? omg), I got fed breakfast lunch and dinner with food that really wasn't too bad. It was all proportioned correctly and some of the meals came with dessert. Husband even 'snuck' me in a big fat piece of chocolate cake to which the kind nurses said 'oh go ahead, YOU DESERVE IT'. Sha, ya think?
During the hardest part of my labor I got to take a warm bath (twice!) with ultra cool bubbles and jets and mood lighting. When things stalled out a bit and being as I was exhausted, they gave me a shot of morphine and I got to take a nap. Really, what can I complain about? Even after I got the epidural and it didn't fully take effect, I got to have it AGAIN. I mean, where else can you go to get food, be waited on, get drugs and then get more drugs when they don't fully numb you? This shit should be illegal!
Things got real scary for us at the very end with some umbilical cord issues, but she came out perfect and screaming and healthy.
Looking back, the very worst parts about my time in the hospital were these 3 things: them taking that awful full back sticker off (remember I had the epi twice so the 1st time it tore the hair off, the 2nd time felt like they tore the skin off), getting into our recovery room at 2am only to be woken up at 430am to pee (OUCH) and then walk around the halls in a complete epi haze, and the absolute worst thing about my labor experience was that one nurse who was checking my cervix in the very beginning who had hands the size of a 5 year old and I swear to you her entire ARM was up my crotch and the pain, oh the pain I felt while she tried to find my cervix, was worse than anything I went thru after that.

Toodles,
JSC

100th post

2009-10-10T09:57:00.003-05:00

Introducing:

Chloe Elizabeth (aka Ninja aka Daughter Extraordinaire).

Labor details to follow, because who doesn't want to know about that?

Mom of the Year for what I went thru but I'm not really complaining because just look at what I have now,

JSC

You heard me

2009-09-17T10:25:00.003-05:00

Dear Ninja,
Thank you for listening to me. We did it. We made it to Week 37. You are now full term and can come out and play whenever you feel like it. Weather it be today, tomorrow, next week, the week after OR even the week after that, I am just fine with it. Good baby. You will forever think Santa is real.

See you soon,
Mommy

Side note: My next post will be my 100th (!) and I will use it to announce Ninja's arrival and all the fun details that I am sure will ensue.

Warning

2009-08-28T15:59:00.003-05:00

There might be some new lurkers to Paper Castles via the baby blog or from NorCalMrs' blog so I wanted to give them a quick shout out (heyyyyy) and a little warning...
Paper Castles is meant for me to vent without a lot of thought or judgement. About anything and everything. Please know that in reading some of these entries you might be offended, start blushing, or maybe even start sweating a little. Like in real life, I swear A LOT. It's not something that I'm particularly proud of, but whatever, it's just what I do. If you get all uppity about swear words, then DON'T READ THIS BLOG. If you feel like your opinion of me might change by reading some of the entries, then please go back to just reading the baby blog. That is G rated. This is R rated.
One other suggestion, if you really really really insist on continuing to read this, please know that I am not trying to offend you, I'm just being me. I like to think that everyone who reads this is like me: open minded, likes making fun of things, and drinks heavily (I'm tempted to write something about not drinking while I'm pregnant but I guess if you really think I would do that then you have bigger problems then I know how to deal with).
Oh and in my little land of unicorns and fairies, people think I'm hysterical.

You have been warned,
JSC

FAT

2009-08-27T13:52:00.002-05:00

Don't ever feel bad about gaining weight.
I had back to back doctor's appointments this week-one on Monday and one on Tuesday.
Both of the appointments were at 1120am.
The nurse lady weighed me at each appointment and guess how much weight was gained in between appointment #1 and #2?
FOUR.
I somehow managed to gain FOUR pounds in 24 hours. I think the nurse lady felt sorry for me so she said the scale was wrong, then blamed it on the medication I am taking. Husband must have felt equally bad because he tried to blame it on maybe me wearing more clothes at appt #2 then at appt #1 (but really I was wearing the exact same outfit because I don't give a shit anymore). Nice thoughts but I think the root of the problem is with me and my obsession with Twinkies.

Oink,
JSC

Odd

2009-08-25T10:40:00.005-05:00

Remember a while back I told you all about that pregnancy website I belong to that gives you weekly updates on what's going on with you and your baby? Here's the update I got this morning, and it's weirdness is right on par with the other one:

Welcome to Month 8 preggers! You have by now successfully made it
thru most of your pregnancy and the best is yet to come!
Your belly is now the size of a basketball, watermelon or the planet
Saturn. People have taken a keen interest in looking at it and if it makes
you uncomfortable, TOO BAD! Get used to it. This is especially
relevant if your belly button is poked out. So after people get a good
look at your belly, there eyes will float center and gawk at your protruding
belly button. Oh My Gosh! Look! It's a belly button on that
big fat pregnant lady! Look at it again, one more time, ok all better now?
No? That's ok, look again! Good times preggers! Even more fun,
your belly is so huge, that it actually makes your ass look smaller! How
perfect is that??????
In utero, your baby likes to kick, jab and punch. Especially your
bladder ribs and hips. This is a fun game that prepares you to not be
so irritated by your child when it comes out and pukes on you. If your
lucky, your little one will get the hiccups at 3am lasting for at least a half
an hour preventing you to sleep. Hey, think about it this way, you will
look like a whale as well as looking like you haven't slept in a week but your ass
will still look tiny! Whoo Hoo!
Only a few short weeks to go until you get to go thru labor and
delivery! That will be your next update so hang in there fatty!

Isn't that odd?

I'm fat,

JSC

Ode to Mini Me

2009-08-19T08:51:00.007-05:00

I had a chat with little niece M last night, it makes me smile and confirms that her parents got it all wrong when they didn't just name her right after me:

Me: Do you like fajitas?
M: Yea.
Me: Do you like green peppers, red peppers and onions?
M: No, I only like orange peppers.
Me: Ok, either way when you come over we'll have fajitas!
M: Yea, I like potatoes.
Me: What? No, fajitas.
M: What? Cheetos?
Me: No. FAJITAS. Say it with me FA-HEEEEEE-TAAAAAS
M: What? Fa-Rita's? What are those?
Me: Never mind, potatoes it is.

Just goes to show that no matter how awful a nights sleep I have (waking up sneezing, wheezing, scratchy throat, eyes watering, tossing and turning because my hips feet & fingers fell asleep, snot running down my face-yea I'm pretty glamorous) there are still things to laugh about.

Life is fun,
JSC

I hope you can hear me

2009-08-13T13:07:00.004-05:00

Dear Ninja,
It has gotten to the point in your long existence where you think you are in charge of me and I want to remind you that you are not. I am in charge little one and when I say you can't come out, you must not come out. I am dying to meet you, don't get me wrong. I can't wait to see your chubby (emphasis on chubby because you will be in my tummy long enough to acquire chub) little face and inspect all of your toes and fingers. I can't wait to find out what you are, a little girl or boy? I think regardless of your gender, you have taken on your Dad's assertiveness by insisting on trying to make an early debut. And it seems you have taken on my impatience for, well, just about everything in the same regards. Really though, I need you to stay in me, because that's where you belong, at least for another 5 weeks. C'mon, you can make it that long, right? It's nice and warm in there isn't it? I know it's cramped, but you will have many many many years to spread your wings and fly. Just stay put damn it.
Your big brother told me yesterday that he is going to teach you how to spell Mom. Won't that be fun? He's going to be a great big brother and is excited to meet you, but even he says it's too early and he's only 8.
Plus, remember the other night when I was all freaked out and I started talking to you about this and I made a little promise to you that if you stuck around on the inside for the next month, I would buy you whatever you want on your birthday's and I will never ever ever ever ever tell you that Santa doesn't exist? Remember that?
Love,
Mommy

Diary of a Pig

2009-08-11T08:43:00.004-05:00

This is what I had to eat yesterday (now you will see why I am 100% shocked and amazed that I haven't gained about 100 pounds in this pregnancy because I eat like this at least three times a week and have decided that exercise is for show offs):

Breakfast (or what I woofed down between 6am-noon):
Bowl of Multi-Grain Cheerios
OJ
3 honking pieces of Beer Bread
Sour cream and chive wheat thins (at least half a box)
Granola bar
Piece of cheese

Lunch (or what I devoured between noon-530pm):
Pomegranate applesauce
Spaghetti dish (mmmmmm noodles)
More beer bread
Cheetos
Tiki Punch Shasta
Twinkie
Regular applesauce
Cashews
And if that's not enough, on my way home from work I decided that this was absolutely necessary to function before dinner:
A LARGE chocolate dipped cone from Dairy Queen

Dinner (can you believe that I still had room to eat from 530-6pm?):
Strawberries and raspberries
Sour cream and onion chips
Grilled chicken with Ranch (naturally)
Even more beer bread (this time slobbered with a one inch layer of butter)
I thought about eating a HoHo but refrained from the temptation

So yea, I won't be surprised if at my dr appt tomorrow and I step on the scale and it says 'STOP EATING YOU MAD WOMAN'

I'm hungry again,
JSC

We love Jackie Boldt

2009-08-10T08:17:00.000-05:00

Click here to see why.

Ug

2009-07-30T07:55:00.003-05:00

Dear Insomnia,
Go away. Your presence in my night life is causing great damage to my ability to post new posts for my friends to laugh at. I hate you.
Until you go away, I will not be writing much.
Thanks a lot jerk,
JSC

Hint

2009-07-24T08:40:00.004-05:00

We have a strong contender for a girl's name.

It was heard by me in this song.

Although it may not come screaming out at you, it's in there.

Any guesses?

JSC

Your dumb

2009-07-23T08:36:00.005-05:00

Dear person in the red Explorer with a yellow shirt on driving down 169 this morning riding my ass like I was driving any faster or slower than the person in front of me would allow and who continued to try and kiss my bumper all the way to my businsess park and gave me the finger as I pulled into my parking lot,
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOFF
ASSHOLE
I hate you and hope you get a flat tire or chipped windshield,
JSC

Does anyone know where I can get one of those yellow diamond shaped things that suction to your window that says Pregnant Lady on Board BACK THE FUCK OFF?
If so, let me know right away or kindly buy me one and I'll pay you back with Thank You's.

What do you mean I can't have sugar?

2009-07-21T08:42:00.005-05:00

I have a dr appointment today where I have the pleasures of getting the glucose test. What's a glucose test you wonder? I'm not 100% sure but I think it means they are seeing if I'm developing gestational diabetes. What does that mean? I don't know. All's I know is that I can't eat an hour before the appointment and I have to 'go light' and not 'gorge myself' on sugar beforehand says my dr.
Um, excuse me, do you know me dr person?
Clearly you don't. Because if you did, you would know that me staying away from sugar is like trying to walk with no feet, making yellow cake without chocolate frosting, or thinking that little niece M is not a complete duplicate of myself (this was confirmed by a story I heard last night about her thinking a conversation about Pop Tarts and ants was actually about cantaloupe---still laughing!).
I love sugar. Me and sugar are friends and if I don't interact with it, it will think I am upset with it and we don't want sugar hurt or sad. How am I suppose to not eat sugar when there is a jumbo size box of Twinkies in the break room that I bought at Sam's Club yesterday because they looked so delicious? How am I not suppose to just open up the one drawer in my desk and not eat an almond Hershey bar? How am I suppose to pretend that a Swiss cake roll isn't in my purse? How am I suppose to ignore the big bowl of candy sitting directly in front of me full of Tootsie Rolls (probably pretty easily being as they are the the last thing I would eat but guess what's in them? SUGAR)? My stomach is growling just thinking about all these things.
I guess I'll just have to suck it up until after the appointment, which I might like to add, is at 1130am. Who scheduled this anyway? Why would you schedule an appointment where you can't eat an hour beforehand over lunch hour? Idiots! (It was me FYI but I'm pregnant, what's your excuse?).
Hopefully I'll survive today, if not, all my worldly belongings (ie ummm, wait, I know I have something, hmmmm, nope...I guess I don't have anything...oh well).

Hungry,
JSC

I really wish I was joking

2009-07-15T15:45:00.004-05:00

We've started the fun task of finding a daycare for Ninja baby. If I could skip this process, I would, but it's something that is unavoidable. If there is one for sure area of my life that I tend to be more judgemental than others, it would come in the form of finding daycares. Rightfully so, these people take care of the most important thing on earth to me.

After some research, I found this lady on my county website, so she was licensed and close by home. Other than her having openings, nothing struck me as extra ordinary about her. She didn't have anything more or less than any other person I checked out. We set up a meeting for this past Monday.
I shit you not, I am not making any of it up. I'm really not that creative at this point.

I google directions and it seems odd to me, but if memory serves me correct, her address is an apartment. I decide that maybe I don't know the area well enough and go anyway. I drive up to the address and it's a house, but it is in fact right smack dab in the middle of about 4 apartment complexes. I'm trying to keep an open mind and not turn around because the driveway up to her house is super bumpy and full of potholes. I look around and see a fenced in yard with outdoor play sets, but there's no grass, it's all dirt. Still going to try. I walk up to the door, with J, and knock. All I hear is little kids screaming 'Someone's at the door!' for about a full minute. Some dude opens it about half way and asks very hesitantly 'Can I help you?' I'm like yeah, do you want to buy some bibles? Just kidding, that's what I should have said. Instead I say I'm here for a meeting with so-and-so and he let's me in. He immediately starts telling me about some traffic jam somewhere in the metro area and I'm like oh that's nice. I can't really hear him that well because there are 3 or 4 little toddlers screaming there heads off and it's echoing. After about 2 minutes, the lady I set the appointment up with who looks like she hasn't bathed or put on a clean shirt in a couple days come bumbling around the corner, baby on hip. She doesn't really introduce herself but starts talking about the kids that are there but they aren't suppose to be or something like that. Honestly I can't remember anything because her voice was really fucking loud. I thought she was just talking loudly because of the kids, but as she's talking, she starts taking me on a tour of her maze of house and her voice never lowered. She was shouting, and I was wincing. Still trying to keep an open mind, she leads me upstairs where I meet her helper person who seemed nice enough but kept yawning. We sit down on a love seat with the loud talker on the the couch. That's when I start noticing things: her house was messy, not dirty, but messy. There was stuff everywhere. She starts talking about her policies and the ENTIRE time she was picking a zit on her chin. I swear by the end of the hour I was there, she widdled a little whole on her face from all the picking. She also had something really weird going on with her bottom lip. It stuck out causing her to drool and spittle when she talked. It was so distracting. J, by this time, is bored out of his gord and she noticed (good sign, right?). She asked him if he wanted to go play outside with her husband and daughter and he said sure. She said he could just go thru the kitchen and out the sliding door. And this is where things went from maybe this chick just talks loud and doesn't like to shower to there is no way in hell I'm coming back here.
J went to the door and couldn't figure out how to open it and asked for some help. She gets up right away (another good sign, right?) and proceeds to walk over to the door. During this short little jaunt, HER FUCKING PANTS FELL OFF. I shit you not, her pants fell to her knees and I got a really frightening view of her underwear. If this would have happened to me, I more than likely would have started laughing and apologize. Not this chick. She just kept walking and talking and babbling about her policies. I glance over at the helper/yawner and she didn't seem fazed by it at all. Like it's normal for her pants to drop at random times. Totally weird. She let's J out and comes back, pants barely back on and from this point on, I stop listening. She could've said Sign up now and I'll pay off your house! and I wouldn't heard it or cared. Sorry, I know things happen sometimes, but if I knew I was having someone come over that might possibly give me money, I would take a shower and put a belt on. But that's just me.
After a while, I take my keys out of my purse and start walking towards the door saying something about dinner and being hungry. I go get J from outside and she follows me, yammering on the whole way. I finally make it in the car and I'm like 'oh my gosh!!!!' and J was all 'What? What's wrong?' Kids...

I have a couple more interviews lined up and for the love of pete, they have to go better than this, right???????
Like I've said before, I couldn't make this shit up if I tried.

Pray for me,
JSC

SAC weekend

2009-07-14T16:06:00.009-05:00

So, as mentioned below, I hung out with my Super Awesome Cousin all weekend, I'm going to call her SAC for all intensive purposes.
We had a grand ole time while she was here.

We ran in a 5k where she placed 9th out of 181 women, and I placed 181st because I walked my pregnant ass around the lake. But I didn't see any other pregnant people out there so technically that means I'm the winner. Duh.

I brought with my 25 dollar Camelbak water bottle because I can't function without it. Just so you know.

We went to the Sculpture Garden after that where SAC and I made almost every single piece of art there into something dirty. Is this wrong? Yes. Were we doing what everyone was thinking of doing? Yes. (see picture in post below). I posted most of those photos on my Flickr site so check them out there. But there is one that I will post here, and it is SAC with a giant piece of turd coming out of a drain pipe:

That's art.

After all that running and sweating and poking fun at arting, we were tired, so we went back to my place and took naps. I love naps and so does SAC. That's awesome.

Our plan was to meet up with MN sister and NAW at McGovern's Pub in St Paul but I (thought) I left my precious Camelbak at the lake where the 5k was. I couldn't find it when we got back so I wanted to check, just in case it was there. (long shot I know but I spent good money on the thing and I'm in love with it). So we go back to the lake and look around for about 20 minutes, peeking in all the garbage's, looking in the bathrooms, along the gutters but to no avail, it wasn't there. Totally bummed we walk back to my car and I wonder if maybe it just didn't roll underneath my seat.
This is where I think the best moment of the trip happened for me. SAC didn't really pick up on any Minnesotan accents, she just picked up on my terrible sailor mouth tendencies. As soon as I looked underneath the seat I seen my beautiful water bottle and exclaim Here it is!
SAC didn't quite share my enthusiasm, says this:
Mother Fucker!!
That's funny.

Giddy with pleasure that I found my water bottle and that I have corrupted SAC's language, we head over the the restaurant and had a lovely dinner with all the free popcorn one can handle.

On our way out, we happened to cross a professional photographer (see: college stoner) and he took our picture:

-------------------------------------
She left the next day, full with the knowledge and influence of my potty mouth and too much food. I had such a great time hanging out with her and getting to know her better. Husband liked her too. How great is that?

I hope the next time I see her it'll be in Philly and she can show me how people are suppose to drive (traffic lights being a mear suggestion) and meet her dogs.

On an unrelated note: You were right, I was wrong, I think ninja is a girl.

Craving apple pie,
JSC

Future post

2009-07-13T15:30:00.005-05:00

I have the next post almost ready to go about my weekend with my cousin, but just to tide you over until then, here's a picture to set the mood:

:

Hi Pretty!

2009-07-09T09:18:00.004-05:00

I've seen some pretty cool pictures, but this one takes the cake over anything I've seen in a long time.

Hey bandwagon! Wait for me!

2009-07-08T10:06:00.004-05:00

I'll admit it right now that I did not want to read this book. I thought the whole concept of it was outlandish, ridiculous, all about vampires (which I also think is stupid) and geared towards 12 year old girls.

About a year ago a friend of mine, well actually, two friends of mine told me that I would love it. I was like 'I like you girl but your crazy'. But they both insisted that it was a great book that is more a love story than anything else. Every single time I got together with the one friend, she would try to put the book in my purse and if that didn't work, shove it down my throat. I got tired of fighting her about it so I caved and said FINE give me the silly book.

Well, I must say that they were right. 100% right. I started reading it and couldn't put it down. I am now an obsessed cow and will more than likely see the movie (oh my gawd!) and am in the process of obtaining the rest of the books in the series.

Good thing I don't have an I'm always right complex.

Run along now and read it,

JSC

How I'm feeling today

2009-07-06T11:26:00.003-05:00

A confusing exchange 2

2009-07-01T14:53:00.007-05:00

I posted A confusing exchange on my other blog so high tail it over there if you want a little giggle.

I wanted to post a couple of winners here as well:

Boss man: Hey, smell this piece of paper.
Me (excited at the notion of smelling piece of paper for reasons I can't explain): BIG sniff
Boss man: Haahahahahhahaahahaa it smells like fart doesn't it? I got it from (some client) in the mail today and my whole office stunk. I couldn't figure out what the foul smell was and finally figured out that it was this peice of paper. ahahahhahahhaah I can't believe how big of a whiff you took hahahahahhahaha
Me: That's gross. Seriously, my baby is going to come out with webbed feet because of you.
Boss man (moves on to the next person): Hey, smell this piece of paper.

Here's another gem (we were talking about Baby Shower games):

Co-worker: You could play pin the umbilical cord on your tummy.
Me: What?
Co-worker (proceeding to animate playing the game): My turn, here I go! I'll stick it right...here. Oops, that was a little low! Hahahahahhahahahha
Me (blank stare): There's something wrong with you.

I couldn't make this shit up if I tried.

Happy 4th of July.

JSC

For the love of gawd what was I thinking?

2009-06-25T10:29:00.002-05:00

I feel like I should point out some obvious things before I start with another fun story:
1) I have been thru labor 2) I did not get an epidural 3) I don't freshly recall a lot of the details except that it felt like I was being sawed in half 4) I never screamed GIVE ME DRUGS 5) It went by really fast but in reality it lasted half a full day 5) I swore up and down left and right that I would never have sex again after it was done.
With those things said, I should have really just thought a little bit harder about my experience because it turns out that just because I don't freshly remember the events, doesn't mean that they are not lingering in my subconscious somewhere waiting to attack. This was proven by last nights events.
I told husband that because I am all knowing in the labor room (taking on a smarty pants attitude about this is not a good idea because I am actually panicking after last night) that we do not need to endure a 6 week coarse or a Saturday Express class on labor and delivery and all of the fine details that ensue. BUT I did tell him if he wanted to, that we could for his sake. The option of not going to the class would be to read some books out loud to each other and RENT A VIDEO. He choose the later. I felt happy. We saved ourselves a precious Saturday and 85 bucks.
Eh-hmm.
Hi, I'm genius, nice to meet you. See, this is where my smarty pants-ness got in the way. I've seen the video and it was gross. It was disgusting. I didn't learn shit from it other than fear. But this was before I went thru labor. And now that I have, I felt like I could weather the video again. It's harmless. I've seen gross things since then (ie Two Girls and a Cup) It would be like watching cartoons or the History Channel. Mind numbing nothingness, right?
WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG
I went to the library last night to check out a labor video and they only had one VHS available. It was filmed in the late 70's early 80's which should have been a huge blaring red sign that I should have just waited for the more recent DVD to be shipped over from the other library. But I figure it was a good night to preview it before laughing at Husband while he watches it (he was out last night). Oh the hilarity I had imagined as I watched him watching a baby coming out of some other ladies vagina and sneering at him 'see what you are going to put me thru?' type comments for an hour. Yea, not so much.
I pop in the VHS into the VCR that I don't think has ever been used and fast forward thru the introductory stuff but begin to notice that this is going to be really hard to stomach because of the 'stars' of the show are hideous. Not like seeing good looking people would make it less horrific, but wait, yes it would've. The 'stars' were probably two of the ugliest people I've ever seen. 1979 or not they were not attractive. They were all...I don't know...hairy. Like everywhere. I mean, if I knew I was going to be on TV, I would at least try and put forth the effort and shave my upper lip or tell my husband to put on a clean shirt. C'mon people.
Anyway, I get to the point where this women is about to give birth and the camera suddenly zooms in about 1 cm from her much needed bush wack of a vagina and I start feeling dizzy. I'm like, uh-oh, I can't watch. I am literally sitting there with one eye closed and one eye squinting behind my fingers in horror of what I am witnessing. Luckily, the nurse lady talked her thru all of it. It went something like this:
"Push just a little bit---good---can you feel that? It's your babies FOREHEAD sticking out of your vagina---ok stop now. I know it's stretching so dr here is going to cut you. Oops, did that sting a little? See that's what you get for not wanting any drugs you hairy fool. Ok, push again, here comes her shoulders! Stop again---hurts doesn't it? We are going to clean out your babies nostrils right now instead of in 2 seconds just so you feel the burn of shoulders stretching out your lady business. There we go. Hey new Dad! Look at your wife's totally stretched out crotch. Sexy isn't it? Here comes your baby's arm---while the rest of her is still in you, our totally obnoxious doctor is going to tell you to look down and force a wave from her to you. Isn't that cute? Ok, big push now! Oops, you pooped a little, that's ok, I'll make sure the guy holding the video camera zooms in on it so everyone can see your shit. Wow, that was fun. While we clean up your baby, we are going to show the delivery of the placenta because everyone wants to see a big blob of alien come out of your bloody crotch. Ok, all done. I'm going to clean you up now. Yum".
Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I'm feeling just nauseous thinking about it.
Needless to say I stopped watching it promptly after this, ejected it out of the VCR, threw across the room and took a shower. I tried to scrub away all of those awful things I just seen but instead every single thing that happened to me during my labor came flooding back into my memory assaulting me in the worst way. I tried to put my fingers in my ears and go lalalallalalallalalallaala but I couldn't stop it. It was like torture.
Husband will not be watching this. It's worse than the Exorcist. I want him to know, but I think a couple episodes of A Baby Story will be just fine.

Humbled,
JSC

2 timer & other things

2009-06-24T07:50:00.005-05:00

I have another blog. It's all about the baby.
It's pretty PG, I've got Grandma's looking at it.

This week so far has been exhausting in the sleep arena. Some of it is my own fault but the past couple of nights I will thank my CHILDREN (see I can say that now-weird!). J has been having nightmares not far off coarse from mine. Last night he said that he dreamt an ostrich bit his head off. That was at 330am. Just as I was about to fall back to sleep, Not Oscar kicked and/or jabbed me with all of it's ninja sassiness that I literally jolted forward.
Thanks kids, Mama will thank you later for all this in the form of a nice Hawaiian vacation alone.

On a completely unrelated note, I want to give three shout outs:
1) Welcome Back NorCalMrs. We all missed you and I am glad that at least one of us gets to own and use a passport.
2) Welcome Back VT sister. We all missed you and what you have accomplished is amazing. Especially wearing a bikini to a work dinner party, that takes some balls.
3) Thanks to who ever is reading my blog(s). I try to keep them entertaining and hope you continue following me in my adventures in suburbia. As long as I know there are at least 1 or 2 of you keeping tabs on me, I'll keep writing.

Carry on,
JSC

Names

2009-06-15T10:55:00.003-05:00

In the past few weeks, we've been tossing around names for Super Baby. Being as we don't know if this little gremlin is a boy or a girl, our list is pretty long.
Sometimes people name their kids after people they love, places they've been, things they like or just because they thought it sounded cool.
The only stipulation I have about this baby is that we keep it simple. So there is no doubt in anyone's feeble heads how it's pronounced.
With that in mind, I have compiled a list of names that we are considering. It should be fairly obvious which is a boy name or girl name. Use your best judgement and please let me know your favorite:

Ranch Dressing
Ketchup (no middle name)
Dave Matthews
Not Oscar
Penny Lane
Rocket Ship
Kit Kat
Chocolate Cake (CoCo for short)
Forever Young
Pepto Bismol
Cutie Pie
Suzy Q
Ninja Gymnast

Toodles,
JSC

Sob Fest at 7am

2009-06-09T07:44:00.003-05:00

In case you don't know me, or have been living under a rock, I love the Dave Matthews Band. All time fav. I heard this song this morning on the way into work and was singing along to it and by the time it reached the end, I was sobbing. I couldn't help it.

Blech.

Reflection

2009-05-31T11:01:00.000-05:00

My kid's will never wear Spider Man anything. EVER.

2009-05-29T15:53:00.005-05:00

I have to share this fun little story that happened on Tuesday. It's wildly entertaining.

As the joys of 2nd trimester continue, one of the best and brightest is always having to go to the bathroom. Like all the time. I drink tons of water so it's a given that I will spend a majority of my day on the toilet. My need to go show's no mercy.
Even at J's baseball games.
At the field on Tuesday, I know for a fact that there is one port-o-potty that is really really really far away. But it's there and I find a little happiness knowing that it's there if I need it. I used it once before and it was pretty decent. It didn't stink, was clean, had a little chart on the side saying when it was cleaned (completely up to date) and had a purell dispenser. As far as port-o-potties go, this one was first class. Big sigh of relief, right?
So Tuesday rolls around and before we leave for the game I am contemplating not going because the Gods hate me and have plagued me with allergies so sitting outside doesn't sound too appealing to me. But somewhere between dinner and Husband coming home and J asking if I'm going (You're going, right Mom?) I decide to go. I had an entire bottle of water for dinner plus watermelon but I didn't think much of it because I had the first class port-o-potty just in case. I'm good to go.
So about 20 minutes into the game I decide that maybe the water and the watermelon combined wasn't such a good idea regardless of squeaky clean port-o-potty. But there is no way I can hold it for another hour. Grrrr.
I drag my ass all the way over to the thing when I am about 3 feet from it this little shit head with Spider Man pajama's cuts in front of me. I'm like Really kid? Fine. I'll wait. So I wait. And wait some more and just when I'm about to tap his Mom on the shoulder and urge her to check on her little blond haired devil, he opens the door ever so slowly. He has this sheepish grin on his face and I notice that he is wiping his hand on his pants. And guess what color was left on his pants after he was done wiping it off? BROWN. He was wiping BROWN stuff all over the front of his pj pants. I'm like OH GROSS DID HE JUST WIPE SHIT ON HIS PANTS????? I'm thinking it can't be true because this kid is at least 4 and should know what toilet paper is right? RIGHT? I really have no choice but to go into the potty because now I waited 5 minutes and really have to go and can't think about anything else but peeing my pants and how dumb it was to woof down 10 pieces of watermelon. So I enter the potty and guess what? THERE WAS POOP ALL OVER THE TOILET SEAT. This little monster successfully wiped his butt all over the fucking toilet seat. Blaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa I'm going to puke. But I have to go pee. So you know what I did? What any other self respecting pregnant lady does: I toilet papered the crap out of the toilet seat and hovered. Duh.
So I get back to the game and I tell Husband what happened and you know what he said? 'How did you hold yourself up with all that weight?'
I just looked at him and my eyes bugged out for a moment but decided the ludicrousy of the situation is sorta funny and decided to take it as a compliment and answered 'With my head propped up against the door of course.'

Readers please note: do not ever buy anything Spider Man for J or this baby because I will promptly burn it.
Thanks.

At least it's legitimate

2009-05-20T16:26:00.004-05:00

The previous post must have sparred some funky waves in my brain because this morning at 430am I woke up gasping for air and waving my hands around wildly due to this:

Dream # 3:

Husband and I were at a zoo in the Snake Exhibit. I was looking at a python type snake in a little plastic cage. I thought it was pretty funny that the snake was striking the side of the plastic cage but wasn't getting too far because it was in the cage. Suddenly, I was in the bathroom in the house I grew up in and the snake was out in the hallway. My genius self wasn't about to be conquered by the snake so I tried to shut the door. Only the door wouldn't close all the way. I started screaming 'MOM HELP ME MOM HELP ME' because the snake was coming towards me. I heard her in the distance say 'Oh just give me a minute would ya' Just as she finished saying that I jumped on the toilet to try to get away but it lunged at my face.
That's when I woke up. 430am wake up time, didn't go back to sleep.

Lovely, isn't it? And I didn't even know that I was afraid of snakes. It's never even been on any list of mine of things I am even remotely afraid of.

Ah pregnancy, bringing out the best in me.

Weird dreams

2009-05-19T11:05:00.002-05:00

I have weird and terrifying dreams A LOT.

Pregnancy hormones only send them into orbit making them unrealistic sounding and far fetched.
Ask Husband or French Kitty the next time you see them and they will tell you that once a week (probably more because I barely remember the times I do wake up) I have a horrific terrifying dream and I wake up screaming or thinking the blankie's are trying to strangle me.
Here are a couple of gems that I can remember freaking my shit out (and no they will not sound scary but in all reality they were):

Dream #1: I was lost in Uptown with Husband. We were going in and out of stores trying to find a record. Why? I don't know. It was raining and the streets were very crowded. We were walking along and ended up in a park. We start running because a YELLOW CLOWN was chasing us. We found a cave and hid in it. We could see him but he couldn't see us and was leering in the cave, laughing.
I woke up from this dream at 3am and didn't fall back to sleep.

Dream #2: I was riding a 10 speed bike on a 4 lane highway but with no cars. I was cold. I was trying to cross the highway and out of no where a little lamb appears. I remember thinking in the dream What the hell is a lamb doing on a highway? Then the lamb attacked me.
I woke up from this dream at 4am and like Dream #1, didn't fall back to sleep. Because of a LAMB.

Told ya. Good thing I'm pregnant because otherwise these dreams certify me as crazy.

Happy Trails,
JSC

I have to get this off my chest

2009-05-12T08:09:00.002-05:00

If one knows me well enough, they know my absolute hatred for traffic. Who really likes traffic I'm not sure but I have heard people try to calm my gripes by offering to take the chance for a little music and me time while battling the stop and go insanism but it just doesn't work. EVER. I am obsessed with finding out why people are slamming on their brakes. I can't help it.
Unfortunately, every single day, I have to fight one of Minnesota's grossest highways: 169. There is no way around it. I have to take it. Unless I invest in one of those car/boat/land truck things, I'm screwed. You see friends I have to cross a very large river, and the one bridge that goes across it is the gateway to work. Not just for me, but for zillions (yes zillions) of other commuters we all have to use this bridge to cross the river to get to our destinations.
I can see this post spiraling way out of control so before I let myself get to heavily invested in my annoyance with said Highway, I am going to get to the point.
The following is a list of reasons why (I think) traffic gets so horribly screwed up. I'd say 98% of them do not make any sense, but rest assured, they are all true (the way I see it anyway).
Eh hmmm....here we go!

Rain
It looks like it MIGHT rain
Snow
It looks like it MIGHT snow
Accident
Accident from previous day
Fog
Fog in distance
Sunshine
Fed Ex truck on fire
Leaves blowing
Wind
Utility truck with orange blinky light on side of road
Person checking man hole in median with orange vest on
Dead deer
Dead deer from yesterday
Dead deer from 2 days ago
Dead deer from 3 days ago
Merging idiots (just let people in for crying out loud. I don't care how long you've been sitting there. They might be lost. Sheeesh)
Broken traffic light
Car on side of road
Cop pulled someone over (nice timing)
Cop on side of road just sitting there
An enormous bag of leaves in the lane (OK, this is possibly the only acceptable reason due to the fact that from a distance it looked like a very large animal)
I don't know, there doesn't seem to be a logical reason

Keep in mind that I am not an angry person sitting in traffic, I just want to know why. And knowing is half the battle, no?
Toodles.

STFU

2009-04-18T07:56:00.004-05:00

I don't know why I decided to entitle this post as STFU. It could be that I just figured out what it meant, or it's more just that I think it's funny. And if you don't, then STFU. In fact, kbl, if you haven't got a new word of the month yet, I say use STFU. It is 4 times the learning in one phrase.
I am quite discouraged to find that I haven't taken any really cool pictures lately. It must be because it's been in the negative digits outside, I'm pregnant and not feeling creative, I can't have a few glasses of wine so everything looks boring, or that I'm lazy. I'd say it's that I'm lazy. But I am acknowledging the problem, and will strive to fix it. I'm all about self improvement.
I did download a few to my flickr site so be sure and check them out when you get a spare minute. I even put a little video of Super Kid on there being the Ninja he is. It's great.
Speaking of pregnancy, I made it to week 15 with no big problems to speak of (and yes I just knocked on wood-be it fake but I still did. Please do the same right now). Isn't that great? Or maybe it's just great to me. Whatever.
I would like to suggest a few movies for you to view. And remember that my opinions are the best.
The first one is Good Luck Chuck. Ever hear of it? Me neither. Husband and I were scrolling thru the movies on HBO and found this one to TiVo. I'm guessing he mostly did it because Jessica Alba was in it but whatever, at least she's pretty. I thought it would be good because it is a comedy and who doesn't like to laugh? Either way this was a GREAT movie. It was really funny. An added bonus for all you couples out there who have husbands or boyfriends who like boobies: this movie has a lot of them in it. And by a lot, I mean A LOT. It was the kind of movie that had a lot of really unexpected things happen in it that made you cringe with laughter. Highly suggest it.
The second one that I am going to talk about is The Knowing. Or Knowing. It's a new movie with Nicholas Cage in it. Husband and I went and seen it in the theater when it first came out. It's always tricky when we go out to see movies because really our taste in flicks couldn't be more different. One of us is always taking one for the team. But this one seemed like it peaked both of our interests so win-win, right? EH no (eh was suppose to be a buzzer sound). This movie was really intriguing until the last 20 minutes then it got all alien on me and I lost all respect for it. It's really too bad because it had some good elements to it in the beginning. Token big eyed pale scary looking little kid, fog, creepy people in the woods, craziness, plane crashes. I guess I would say if you do go see it, leave or stop your DVD when the one lady gets in a car wreck. Then just make up your own ending. It'll be better than the original no matter what. Trust me.
Oh and I would like to suggest a book. I read lots of books and some of them are good, others not so much. When I read one that is not so great, I go for months without reading anything. But then something comes along where it renews my faith in authors and I go on a reading streak.
Now don't get all angry and 'she's not really an author' on me, but just give it a chance. I read Tori Spelling's sTORI Telling in two days. Yes, two days.
Let me tell you why I bought it in the first place: One day I was home with the queses and on Oxygen Channel there was a 'Tori and Dean Inn Love' marathon on followed by 'Home Sweet Hollywood' marathon. Both Tori Spelling reality shows. The thing that got me about her is that she's totally hilarious and super down to earth. She knows what people are saying about her and it's almost like she's doing these things to prove them wrong. One episode in particular that made me like her is when her and her husband were in Germany doing press for her book or the show I can't remember which. Anyway, they went to some restaurant that was in a Bed and Breakfast of sorts. She ate a whole bunch of food and the food didn't like her so much so she had to rush off to the bathroom. They go from showing her walking into the bathroom (which was in some guests room that she didn't know because they had no public toilets that she could find) to her rushing out of it and back to the table where she urgently tells her husband 'Dean, we have to go NOW. I just had a major diarrhea explosion in the bathroom and the toilet overflowed all over the floor. LET'S GO!'. That's funny.
So that's why I bought the book and that's why after taking only 2 days to read it, I suggest it.
Plus I grew up watching 90210 and she gives a lot of inside dish about the show. Who doesn't love that?
So now that I've rambled on endlessly about nothing, I will release you from my blog claws.
Remember to STFU.

Why I deleted my Facebook account

2009-04-16T11:09:00.000-05:00

Because I thought it was dumb.

Oh boy

2009-03-31T18:00:00.004-05:00

Here is yet another song that I heard just a mere 10 minutes ago and had me weeping like a little girl (sorry Mom, I tried, but you said if I need to cry to just let it out).
Have the kleenix handy...

New Symptom: Road Rage

2009-03-26T10:52:00.003-05:00

Hi Friends
As I awaken from 1st trimester coma, I have a new found appreciation for making it thru the day without a)throwing up on my dentist b)crying c)feeling nauseous and d)hating life.

There is one exception and an extension that goes with d though. I don't literally HATE life please know that, I actually value it very highly. It may be my over-zealous hormones with maybe just a little displaced anger sprinkled in for fun but lately I have been out of control behind the wheel. Back in my 20s (eeesh did I just write that?) I knew I was a bad driver. I would speed, swerve in traffic, slam on my brakes and honk my horn a lot. I didn't care and thought it was funny that people thought I was a bad driver. Years go on, a car accident and one Super Kid later and I've calmed down quite a bit. I don't drive slow, I just drive very cautiously. Mabye a little too cautiously according to some people but I prefer to be on the safe side. Sue me. One big thing that changed my habits for the greater good is being a passenger in the car with Husband. Oh how I love him dearly but put me in the car with him and I turn into a nervous wreck. I'll spare you the details but I will say that I shut my eyes a lot and tell him to STOP at the top of my lungs at least 5 times no matter where we go. Anyway...
Forward on to the past week or so and I have turned into a bitch on wheels. People who ride my bumper have always peeved me off. I now seek revenge. I did it yesterday and today.

Yesterday some lady decided going 60mph in a 50mph zone wasn't fast enough but I didn't move over into the next lane because I had to turn into J's daycare. Sure as shit she continued to ride my ass the whole mile up to the turn lane. Well well well lookey lou who is turning into daycare right behind me but this lady. I was so angered by her that instead of holding the door open for her as I walked into the building (because of course she was walking really close behind me as well) I let the door slam on her face. You have to punch in a little code to get into the daycare so I thought that added a little salt to the wound. You also have to punch in a code when you pick your child up and I decided that taking my time to do this added the little extra punch. Why is she in such a hurry anyway. Calm down. Or maybe I should but who cares. I'm pregnant. Leave me alone.
This mornings incident was similar. Some lady was riding my ass but I didn't move because I was turning. First chance she got she sped around me and in turn, I rode her ass all the way to work. It was just a big fat coincidence that she works in the same business park as me. Ha Ha Beeee-otch!
I know this is unhealthy behavior. I know it's unsafe. Save me the lecture, k? I get a small satisfaction in knowing that I am contributing to the golden rule: Don't mess with pregnant woman on the highway or you will pay!!!! ahahahhahahahhaaa
Just kidding.
And I know that's not the golden rule.

Weird, right?

2009-03-24T11:13:00.006-05:00

So I belong to a few pregnancy websites. You know the ones where they give you weekly updates as to what is going on with you and the baby? Ya, those.
I thought it was alarming at first, but then slightly magical that one of them told me this:

This week your little one is the size of a lemon or lime. A good size lemon, like the one you buy when you get a case of Corona on a hot summer day. Your uterus is the size of a grapefruit. This will scare you so your eyes are going to bug out of your head like two strawberries.

Changes with you are really making themselves known. You are going to acquire something technically called pregnancy neural dysfunction or more simply, Pregnancy Brain. Pregnancy Brain means you will do things you wouldn’t normally do because you are preoccupied with the thought of a little person inside of you, labor, and breastfeeding. Pregnancy Brain side effects include: thinking the water in the shower is cold when it really isn’t, dropping your rubber band that is keeping your pants on in the toilet after peeing, not knowing how to differentiate between 12AM and 12PM, reading 200+ page books in one day, thinking that 9 hours of sleep is not enough, unrealistic bargaining with husband, walking up at 2am to pee, thinking that cherry 7up is the best thing since your wedding day, crying uncontrollably, overanalyzing situations and not vacuuming like you usually do every Wednesday.

As the weeks progress unfortunately Pregnancy Brain just gets worse. Hopefully you have a husband who will understand that you are still in there somewhere and that you will re-emerge after the pregnancy with the help of a couple bottles of Kendall Jackson (wink wink).

See...weird, right?!!?!?!?!!

Vomit!

2009-03-20T08:15:00.001-05:00

Hi Everyone
I have a doctors appointment today.
I'm nervous.
Wish me luck.

Oh---I have no idea what the shiz is going on with my background. It just up and disappeared and I've been too busy, preoccupied with myself, and nauseous to pinpoint the problem and fix it. Hopefully everyone will be ok with this boring stark white background for the time being.

Sorry Friends

2009-02-28T07:20:00.004-06:00

You know that feeling you get right before you vomit? Especially the night of or morning after a alcohol induced frenzy? The kind of woozy you feel where you know for a fact that your head is not moving, but it feels like it is like after getting off a spinny ride? That oh my gosh just make it stop go away please now? The feeling that it would just be better if you actually did throw up so you didn't feel like you got kicked in the gut by a two year old? The one where even if you have a couple slices of toast and some OJ it just makes it worse, not better? When you are about a couple of seconds away from telling someone at work you think you are having a heart attack and you get all sweaty but don't because then they would think you are crazier than you already are? Or when someone says to you 'Ya know, you don't look so good. In fact, your lookin' a little green' (this was actually said to me by my boss)? Ever feel that way?
I have. Everyday since said previous posts' announcement. For about 5 hours out of my waking day. I'm not kidding.
I thought that having the case of the vomits that one day would make the feeling a little less but guess what? It didn't go away. Blasted 1st trimester!
The worst example thus far was on Thursday, when I had my dentist appointment. I wasn't feeling well at all but decided to just go and get it over with. I told them I was preggers and not feeling well but the lady insisted on 'just taking a look see' anyway. I sat in the chair, she put the obnoxious napkin around my neck and proceeded to push the magic button and the chair started it's trip to upsidedown city. About the time my head was 2 inches from the floor, every feeling I described above started to happen and before I knew it I my light lunch came back up my throat, out of my mouth, and onto the floor. So I thought. After collecting myself I noticed that it got on the dental hygienist lady's leg. Oh the fucking horror.

Please be patient with me if I don't post for a while. Things like this are hard to overcome.

A New Super coming soon.

2009-02-15T18:48:00.005-06:00

Where have you been?

2009-02-15T07:37:00.004-06:00

Where have you been for real? Neglecting my poor little blog I think.
How dare you.
A small update:
Sister and I ran (walked) in another 5k yesterday on Valentine's Day and I've been busy sleeping since then. Husband did in fact download the pictures but I can't find them so I guess until then I won't be posting.
But I am here, alive and well, snuggling with a blankie most nights, sleeping by 8pm (who am kidding? More like 730pm).
Much to report but without the pictures it just won't pack in the same punch.

Be well friends.

Give me an N!

2009-02-05T07:58:00.003-06:00

One of my favorite blogs to poke around on is Clever Girl Goes Blog. She had a challenge recently for all of her followers and it was that she would assign a letter of the alphabet to you and then you would write about 10 things you lurve starting with that letter. The lovely CGGB assigned me with the letter N. So here goes nothing friends (and you can certainly bet that I will label this post 'work with me'):

1. Noodles. Duh. Like I even have to describe why I love noodles. Who doesn't?
2. Nothing. Mama loves to do nothing. Be it starring at the tv or starring out the window. I find myself being blissfully happy doing nothing.
3. Nieces. I looooooooove my nieces. Every single last one of them. I want to gobble them up to pieces.
4. Night. Night + starry nights + sleeptime + sleeping + quiet + uninterrupted + warm blankies = happy mama.
5. Neighborhood. What can I say? I love my neighborhood. When I first moved there I sorta thought it was like living in the Twilight Zone because everyone mowed their lawns on the same day but after a while I grew accustomed to seeing the same houses, people and pretty lawns day in and day out. It's comforting actually.
6. Nerds. Like the candy. Who doesn't love Nerds? I don't know who doesn't but I do. I had a little box of them just yesterday. The strawberry kind. Mmmmmmm...nerds.
7. N*SYNC. Shut up.
8. Nacho cheese. I could dip just about anything in nacho cheese. Chips, fruit, bread, veggies. You name it, I'm dippin'.
9. News. I have some.
10. Newborns. :)

Anyone else game just let me know. I'm bossy so assigning you a letter and telling you to do something isn't a stretch for me.

Toodles

Super

MOM

2009-01-22T11:22:00.002-06:00

Hi Friends
A new addition to Paper Castles will be MOM.
MOM=Movie of the Month.
I have fallen off the WOM wagon (not making any sense at all if you think about it. I might have a case of diagnoses dyslexia) and decided that MOM made more sense. I will give you my biased opinion of what you should watch and why. Remember that my opinions are the best and I don’t care about yours.
I have already advised you to go out and see Four Christmas’ so let’s consider this Decembers MOM. For many many many reasons this movie is great. First and foremost it is funny. Like laugh out loud funny. Husband and I were cracking up throughout it and I even witnessed Husband knee slap. The story line is easy to follow and characters not completely out there. It really is worth seeing twice. For those of you who have seen it, how funny was the baby puking scene at the end? Brilliant! Plus, it’s never difficult for me to watch Vince Vaughn. Very handsome indeed.
For January’s MOM I decided on Juno. Please, for the love of whatever God you trust, go see this movie. I enjoyed it from the moment it started to the very end and every minute in between. I don’t need to go over the basics like it was written by a woman from Minnesota, is set in Minnesota, has won many a awards and has an excellent soundtrack.
The reason why I like this movie so much is because it is all about emotion and perception. The trickiness of relationships and honesty.
The part that got to me, in short, was when after Juno had her baby, she was laying in the hospital bed all curled up. She was crying. In walks her boyfriend who just lays with her and holds her.
I saw myself in that scene. I was that girl. 8 years ago I was the one laying in a dull hospital room with the currents drawn, scared out of my mind and an emotional wreck. It brought me back to that day, that moment, that second where I was completely overwhelmed and lost. Unlike the movie, nobody came in and laid with me. I had a baby daddy who stole money from me out of my purse when I wasn’t looking and took a check and wrote it out to cash. BUT, I did have a handful of visitors. I remember wanting to put on a brave face and I tried with all my will to act natural when I held Super Kid, but I always felt like I was going to break him and silently panicked when he moved because I thought…I don’t know…I thought he would suddenly have super strength and throw himself out of my arms and fall to the ground.
Whew! So…like I said, just go see it.
You won’t regret it.

TIHLSWLS

2009-01-15T13:06:00.003-06:00

It's been a while...

I urge you to see the movie, Four Christmas', like I urge people to nap.
Husband does not hold on to things like I do.
I have a super cool cousin.
I felt like smoking for the first time in 3 years last week.
Throwing up is really lame.
Flannel sheets are the best invention.
I will never tire of hearing Tales of Napoleon.
The prospect of getting a new cell phone has turned me into a giddy 13 year old.
Beef Stew = Bliss.
I think I have water stuck in my ear.
I miss summer.

A letter of honesty

2009-01-15T11:18:00.003-06:00

Dear Minnesota:
It's cold out. Too effing cold. I don't like it. I left the garage this morning and the rear view mirror thermometer said 0 degrees. By the time I reached the end of the street, it said -27.
-27.
Really? Could it get any colder? Probably not.
People are forgetting their manners and driving like complete idiots. I have lost count of how many cars I have witnessed speeding and darting in and out of lanes only to start spinning around in circles and into the ditch or other vehicles. Just this morning, I seen a red trans-am looking car speed up ahead of me (excuse me for driving the posted speed limit of 35 on a winding side street) only to spiral out of control and cream into an unsuspecting Accord going the opposite dircetion. Ever hear of black ice? Look it up buddy.
Let's not forget my 2+ hour commute home the other day because of the snow storm you placed on our laps ALL DAY. Thanks a lot.
In efforts to ease my nerves and my nagging, please get warmer promptly, or I will be forced to move someplace tropical.

Like Brazil.

Lutsen Pictures

2009-01-07T19:13:00.004-06:00

Here are two pictures from Lutsen:

That's me on the left and Super Kid way down in front of me.

There are more on my Flickr site. Click on the link to view them!

Pity? Party of One?

2009-01-07T08:07:00.004-06:00

Well, so much for resolutions. Mine for this year is pretty grand compared to last years and the years before (2008-Don't eat McDonald's, 2007-no pop, 2006-stop smoking). This year I wanted to stay more positive, more optimistic, be more happy.
Shah, that resolution was blown January 2nd. Won't go into details but I will say that there was nothing cheerful about my night.
Thinking that one little night couldn't deter me, January 5th rolled around. Although this story has a silver lining, I can't remember the last time things seemed so incredibly terrible.
We arrived back home from Lutsen on Sunday, all of us exhausted. Super Kid was in bed sleeping by 630pm, me 7pm and Husband 830pm. One would think after 11 hours of sleep I would feel refreshed and ready to go, and I was for the majority of the day, but then 4pm came and I hit a major wall. My head started to hurt, I got all icky frustrated at nothing, and the thought of going grocery shopping was just making it worse. But I had to go. We had no food in the house after being gone. Husband and I agreed earlier in the afternoon to have taco's for dinner so my main focus was remembering all the stuff needed: meat, lettuce, cheese, the taco kit box etc. I pick up Super Kid and head to Target to get taco stuff and other things for the week. Head still pounding. Bags under eyes getting darker and darker. My frustration heightened when I kept running into this lady. Every place I went, she went. Every isle I went down, she was right there. Has this ever happened to you? Normally I don't know if I would have noticed, but this day I did. I smiled at her at first contact but then I just got annoyed. Moving on, I get through the grocery shopping and back home where Super Kid needs to get started on his homework, groceries need to be put away, cat puke wiped up. All of these things I wanted, for no reason, to be done by the time Husband got home. So I'm rushing around and I go in the pots and pans cupboard to grab the meat pan and at the same time open the cupboard where the taco kits are. Upon picking up the meat pan, it's lid which is glass, was sitting on top of it.
Guess what happened next?
It slid off as I picked it up and shattered to the ground. Glass everywhere. I mean everywhere. I had no idea that a lid about 10 inches in circumference, could shatter so far and wide. I just stood there for a second in disbelief. I said 'I can't believe that just happened.' And then a moment later, I look to see that we don't have any taco kits and I forgot to buy one at the store. The next moment I hear the garage door opening. Great, Husband is home and will walk into this mess I have made. So I fly down the stairs into the garage to grab the broom and I blurt out 'I dropped the lid' practically in tears. Poor Husband was like 'What????' I go back in, hands shaking, trying not to completely lose it, and start sweeping up the glass. Husband comes in and sees the mess and I just fell apart. I start sobbing 'I forgot the taco dinner kit' and you know what he did? He hugged me. Right there, in the middle of a glass filled kitchen, hugging me saying 'What's wrong?' and 'It's ok, you didn't know we didn't have the taco kit, we can have taco's tomorrow' and 'we have another lid' For about 5 minutes, I just stood there and cried, and he held me.
All the while, Super Kid is sitting at the kitchen table, doing his homework. At some point, and I honestly don't know when, he slithered downstairs and started playing with his Lego's. I can't imagine what he was thinking.
I cleaned up the glass and decompressed in our bedroom. I came out about 30 minutes later to find Super Kid finishing up some soup. This is what he said: 'Mom, I feel really bad for you that you dropped the lid. Really bad. It's OK though, everyones clumsy every once and a while.'
What would I possibly do without them?
Really, I think I'm the luckiest girl alive. Sure, we all have our icky moments. Super Kids whines and cries with the best of them. Husband gets stressed out and is crabby. But seriously, without these two, I don't know what I would do.
I know this is such a minor thing to complain about and I know other people have much much larger problems than these. This is just one night in the life of me. So I thought instead of dancing around blog postings talking about things that are nonsensical, I would share a blurb of how real my life can be.
So the next time you have a crappy icky frustrating night, you know that you are not alone, and that we are all in this together, going through the same stuff. On some level.

Have yourself a good day...

Happy New Year!

2009-01-05T11:52:00.002-06:00

We arrived back safe and sound from our skiing adventure in Lutsen. I'll post more details and photos in the coming days. Whew! What a great time we had!!!
Quick special thanks to NorCalMrs who changed her blog, so I changed mine too.
I never claimed to be a leader, so why start now?
Kidding of course.
Not really.

Memories

2008-12-26T13:51:00.003-06:00

As the holiday season of 2008 comes to a close, I find myself reflecting on the moments that made this Christmas so great. And, as I know most of you have been waiting and waiting and waiting to hear them, I'll gladly share.

In no particular order, here are the memories that will last a lifetime:

Seeing my little god-daughter/niece go up to Super Kid during present opening and saying 'oh my gosh' and hugging him even though we wasn't opening anything.
Hearing VT sister laugh at the completely ridiculous Holiday Letter I sent her that forced Super Smart nephew to read out loud (at my request) knowing full well that I littered it with the f-bomb about 20 times.
Eating Strawberry Jam.
Making Corn Beef & Cabbage to absolute perfection (another ancient family recipe on Husbands side that I was nervous about making).
Super Kid believing (probably for the last time) that Santa exists and brought him presents.
Super Kid wearing his new skiing helmet and goggles while watching WallE in his PJ's at 11am. (I took a picture and will post it soon, it's hilarious and cute at the same time).
Husband and Super Kid smiling at the same time.
Setting up my new iPod (OMG I was so excited to get one!).

And the best memory was a conversation that I had with Super Kid. We just popped in WallE and he was sitting on the floor. I said 'Hey Buddy, come up on the couch with me and we'll watch it together'. He plopped down on the couch and brought a very interesting, peculiar smell with him. The following chat took place and made me realize that this child is just like me (undeniably sarcastic and honest) :
Me: PU Buddy did you fart?
Super Kid (without skipping at beat): No, it's probably your breath.

Priceless.

Ok fine

2008-12-14T09:00:00.004-06:00

And the winner of the contest is (drum roll please)...

NOBODY!

Nobody guessed it dead on but KG was the closest. I did find out that she formed a posse of lurkers who checked out the photo to try and help her out so because she CHEATED (although I never stated any rules about getting help because I didn't think anyone would actually try to guess so in future contests you cannot have your friends check out the picture and help you so you can win) she didn't win fairly.

But she was almost right.

I have another picture that was taken right after the contest pic, maybe it will shed some light on what it is:

Does this help?

It's our front window. If you've ever looked at my Flickr photo's you'll see that I took the scary storm cloud picture out the same window. Or, if you've ever been to my house, you know that there is a chair sitting in front of the window. I was sitting there, I tilted the camera sideways, and snapped a shot of the snow that was stuck to it during our most recent snow storm.

See it now?

So KG was almost there with her guess of snow on the blacktop or snow on the camera lens. But I can't verify that she actually guessed it. So if the person who guessed it would like to come forward, I will gladly send you a useless prize. Or, KG, if it was you, I need proof from your helpers that it wasn't them. See what happens when you cheat?!?!??!?!!

I am going to start something new on Paper Castles in the next couple of days so stay tuned friends!

Hints

2008-12-11T15:28:00.003-06:00

I am so happy that more than 2 of you are guessing on the contest picture! How exciting!
Unfortunately, you guys are way off. Well, all but one of you is. One answer almost hits the nail on the head but not quite.
Here are some hints:

Picture was taken inside my house by me.
I was drunk.

Good luck! Contest will end soon!

Contest!

2008-12-07T07:40:00.005-06:00

So it seems that people like to have contests on their blogs.

Always a follower, I am going to do the same.

Who needs Christmas bonus' or secret Santa gifts when you have me and Paper Castles to send you something you would never buy for yourself even if you had an extra buck or two.

If you can guess what this is a picture of, I will send you something marvelous.

Don't be too quick with your answer, there is more than meets the eye here.

Leave your answers in Comments (kbl, norcalmrs, KG, Denise), all you other ninnies can just e-mail me or if you're feeling brave, actually leave it Comments. Just a thought.

Good Luck!

This is for you Sister

2008-12-01T19:24:00.001-06:00

We did it!

2008-11-29T07:18:00.003-06:00

Sister and I ran in a 5k on Thanksgiving Day morning successfully.

All those weeks of training really paid off. I'm so glad that we did this together. It was so great and having her there gave me memories that will last forever. Plus I beat her. How awesome is that?!?!?!? (Sorry, had to throw that in there. She probably would have creamed me but towards the end she was at war with her hair and that spiraled into having a mini-heart attack or wanted to throw up, more on that below).

I am going to attempt to post pictures but if Blogger starts acting up, this might be published as a partial post. It's early, I have a hangover, and I was woken up by French Kitty barfing up the gorgeous flowers that were given to us by sister all over the hallway. Work with me Blogger, work with me.

Oh, and I normally don't like posting pictures of my actual mug shot but I think it's almost unavoidable. Oh well. Couldn't keep it a secret forever.

We started off the day being the first one's there, which left us about an hour to take some pictures, which helped us warm up:

We found the restroom to be warm and toasty, so we stayed in there for a while, finding peace and solitude amongst the sinks:

More and more people started to show and stand in line to register, I am in there, can you find me?

We still had about 35 minutes so we decided to wait in the truck until the race started (why we didn't think of this sooner, I'm not sure) :

The time arrived for us to stand and wait for the big start, I was so excited!

We were informed that in order to complete the 5k, we would have to run around the lake twice. Here's me the first time around:

That guy next to was like 'lady your crazy' I was yelling. :)

Here's me the 2nd time around in almost the exact same spot, I was flying:

Like I mentioned above, towards the end sister was having some difficulties with her hair, which I really think lead to the end of her demise. She wanted to walk off her heart attack, I mean hair troubles, and told me to go ahead. She was kind enough to take a shot of me doing just that:

This was really close to the end. She caught up to me and we kicked up into 5 gear and sprinted to the end. It was so exciting. Even more great was they were playing the song that sister picked out for me for the wedding. Isn't that funny? Of all the songs in the world they could have played they were playing that one.

It was such a wonderful feeling of accomplishment for me to do this and have sister by my side. She didn't have to come with, but she did and that means the world to me. Running in an event like this has been a goal of mine for so long, and I did it. Well, we did it. Together. Thanks sister, I love you.

We took another picture at the end, sweaty red cherry popped faces and all:

Attractive, right?

I plan on continuing to run, and hopefully run in more and more events in the future. I have caught the running bug and can only hope to accomplish a 10k, half marathon and full marathon. What? A girl can dream, can't she?

The biggest thing I learned from this experience would be to make sure my toe nails are properly trimmed. The toenail on my 4th toe attacked my middle toe with avengece and this is was what happened:

Can you see on the left shoe on the outside how it looks like it's a different color? It is because it's blood. Literally my toe bled right thru my shoe.

Thanks to everyone for cheering me on in spirit!

Cheers!

(side bar: I am going to attempt to publish this now, and it looks fine here. But I have learned that Blogger does weird things when it come to pictures so if it looks f*cked up I am blaming Blogger. Or maybe it's something I'm doing. No, let's blame Blogger).

Get a load of this

2008-11-23T06:44:00.001-06:00

Really?

2008-11-20T08:07:00.002-06:00

So I only have TWO readers willing to come forward and admit they read this blog? TWO? Well I think it's fair to say that there at least 3 more of you that are too chicken shit to leave a comment and possibly some others lurking around that haven't either. C'mon, don't be afraid, you can even post a comment and be anonymous. (This is possible so don't give me that 'I couldn't figure it out' BS). Oh well. THANK YOU to NorCalMrs and kbl for being brave and letting me know that you are faithful and committed readers of Paper Castles. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy, like after have a couple glasses of wine in the tub. Or something.

MN sister and I will be running in a 5k together on Thanksgiving Day and I couldn't be more excited. I know it's not a huge feat to run 3.1 miles, but for me it's like landing on the moon. It has been a goal of mine for the past...oh...I don't know...10 years or so to run in one of these organized events so I am living out a dream friends. My 8 week coarse is done so I have been taking it easy the past week, letting my body recoup (by recoup I mean develop tendinitis in my ankle. What am I? 80?). So for the TWO OF YOU who read this, be cheering me and sister on in spirit at 830am on Thanksgiving Day morning.

That's all for now, thanks for reading YOU TWO.

I was reminded of this today...

2008-11-16T19:59:00.005-06:00

Remember to De-Lurk yourself...I'm waiting!!!!!

Tell me who you are, don't be afraid!

2008-11-13T10:07:00.003-06:00

I thought I knew the 4 people who read this, but my site visit counter tells me another story...

I DID IT!

2008-11-09T11:49:00.003-06:00

I finished my 8 week running program today with a bang!

I ran my longest ever today, 2 miles consecutively, no stopping in between. What a great feeling! I even accomplished this at the mini mall gym (where I have found that I sweat like a banshee but whatever, it prevents people from using the treadmill next to me. I must look like a slobbering pig, beat red face with sweat running down my lovely face. Oh well).

So now I am on to my next task which is another running program by the same people/website as the 8 week one. This one is 6 weeks. Updates to share in the coming weeks I'm sure.

On an unrelated topic, here is my WOM selection for November:

Flying Dog Classic Ale. Yes, I realize this is a beer but it is good enough to make my wine list. If that makes any sense. I know it doesn't but just go with it ok? I received this as a birthday present (high class friends I have). I didn't drink it with any food. I just had it alone. Not by myself alone but not with any snacks.

Highly recommend. Go ahead, try it. You won't regret it.

WOM for October

2008-11-07T21:47:00.007-06:00

Is it still October?
The month where Super Kid turned 8 years old and reminds me every single solitary day that he loves me no matter how tired, cranky, PMSy, and moody I am?
The month where I, Super 2, celebrated her 32nd birthday doing what she loved the most which was eating a hearty breakfast at The Original Pancake House for breakfast, eating salmon for dinner, and watching reality TV for about 3 hours, and had a handsome husband give me the best wine on earth?
The month where we celebrated Halloween by Treat-or-Treating in our non seemingly booze infested (rejoicefully so) neighborhood where 'everybody knows your name and their always glad you came' ?
Yes, October was very kind to me this year (dispite a few hicups that I would luvre to complain about but won't).
But because it was filled with such goodness, I will save my selection for WOM for October, and it will be worth the wait and shell shocking I assure you.
Which reminds me of my shell shocking 22nd Birthday present from Mom. It was a Cabbage Patch Kid. It was attached to a card that said 'Good things come to those who wait.'
Words to live by, no?
Moms are smart.

I like running on the treadmil (Gasp!)

2008-10-31T16:52:00.006-05:00

Hi Friends

I am on to graduating Week 7 of my running regimen. Just in time for the weather to turn cold rainy and gross (not today which is a very nice 65 degrees and sunny--perfect for tonight's festivities--more on that later).

My work out Tuesday was this, and I quote:

Today you are going to try something different. Go to a school track or a trail
in your area (hee hee hee) that you have measured. Warm up with vigorous walking
for 10 minutes then jog 2x1 mile repeats...

Apparently these fine folks didn't anticipate a Minnesotan training near daylight savings time in October. Sorry, but it gets dark at about 430pm and this mama isn't going any where near a trail or an unlit high school track. Na-ah. No way.

So my only option is to go up to mini-mall fitness center and brave the treadmill. I was frightened of this unavoidable situation for various reasons, a few being:

Falling off the treadmill.

Sweating all over the place.

Setting the speed too fast and being to proud to slow it down.

Having the super fit hot chick/or dude next to me do the same workout and not sweat all over the place.

To name a few.

Well anywho, I had no choice but to go up to the fitness place to get this all important work out in. I wasn't about to skip it. I am very proud to say I have only missed ONE workout during this whole 7 almost 8 week regimen due to Super Kid's birthday (I do have priorities). So that's walking/jogging every day except for Friday's and Monday's which are required rest days.

So there.

I enter in the gym and it's it's usual quiet self, except for the clanking of the weights and the treadmills. I nervously walk up to the only open one. I am sandwiched in between two older gentlemen who are walking fast, but I do note that once they saw me, they started going faster. Whatever, I'm just going to do my thing and try not to fall off.

I should probably take a minute to explain the reason why I am nervous about falling off these things. If you know me at all you know the answer. Yours truly is a little uncoordinated. Little meaning a lot. So for me to step onto a moving object, try to look graceful, and watch a tv that is about 5 inches above my forehead is a little undaunting for me. It's either watch the tv or watch myself running in the huge floor to ceiling mirror. Ah, no thanks.

Getting back to the story, I step on the treadmill and start walking. No problems so far, I've walked on a treadmill a billion times. After the warm-up, I now have to make the thing go faster to start jogging. I go a little bit at a time. A little bit more. One more time. K, now I'm at a comfortable jogging speed. And there you have it! I did it! For the next two miles or whatever it was, I am jogging at a good pace, not sweating too much (I don't think anyway), can still keep my breath, and not a single time did I feel like I was going to fall off. Yeah me. I actually liked it because it keeps track of your time/speed/distance for you, right in front of you. So I don't have to rely on my cell phone stop watch or worry about a silly dog dodging out in front of me or the wind or rain! It's great!

I am onto week 8, my last week, I can't believe I actually went thru with this whole thing. Husband asked me what I was going to do after I was done with the 8 weeks and I honestly don't have any idea. Maybe I'll start training for a 10k...maybe.

Happy Halloween to all.

Drink up Bitches

2008-10-25T15:41:00.001-05:00

It's my birthday.

Cheers!

Wish List

2008-10-22T08:11:00.003-05:00

Hi Friends

Have you ever wondered what I wished for? Like, 4 or 5 years ago? Sure you have. Along with your own busy lives I am sure your mind has wondered into thinking 'I wonder what Super 2 wished for like 4 or 5 years ago.'

Well, wonder no more my prettys, I will gladly tell you. (And of course I wished for world peace, the end of hunger and the cure for all known diseases so don't get all 'oh wow how selfish of her' on me, k?)

Alright, brace yourself, here's the list:

My Husband

Doozy of a list huh. What can I say, I'm a pretty lucky girl. We all have flaws. And by 'we all' I am mostly talking about myself. I know how I am. I'm moody. I spaz out over small things. I get upset when people don't say thank you (I'd like to take this opportunity to say Thank You to anyone reading this who I might have accidentally forgotten to say Thank You to for whatever reason or occasion). I like to have things go perfectly (yes I live in a land of rainbows and unicorns). I'm sensitive, like little girl sensitive. I put my foot in my mouth A LOT. I get up at the crack of dawn on the weekends. Despite all of these things, husband loves me. And he tells me he loves me a lot and I like it. I know there are some of you out there that don't say you love your spouses/friends/family that much (guilty!) but I think if I didn't hear husband say it to me, I would probably start walking backwards and convince myself it was normal because it would be so weird to not hear him say it to me. And yes, I completely rely on him to make me feel good. Not really but just to beat you to the punch. Although sometimes I don't see it right away, husband goes out of his way just to make me happy. And we all know how difficult that is sometimes, right?

So, now that I have fulfilled your curiosity over what I wished for like 4 or 5 years ago, I will now satisfy another one of your curiosities about what I wish for NOW. Like today. Again, OF COURSE I wish for the end of world hunger, world peace, and money for Super Kid's college education. But if money were no object (and I know it is because I don't have any of it---but still happy and well adjusted, sortof well adjusted anyway), this is what I would wish for.

Here we go!

Volkswagen Toureg
Naps everyday in the middle of the day
A really cool job
A new pair of black pants
A new pair of black shoes exactly like the ones I have now (they don't make them anymore and frankly I think they kinda smell and the back is coming apart but I REFUSE to throw them out and until someone else does, I will continue to wear them)
Mint body wraps every other weekend
The ability to sleep past 7am
Plane tickets
To try and figure out why my upcoming 32nd birthday is hitting me like a ton of bricks
A bigger garage
A trip to California to see people that I miss
And to Vermont (duh)
Something to do at work today
The sun to shine
Magic Lamp

Alright, there you have it. Pretty impressive isn't it?

Now that I have wasted 5 minutes of your lives that you will never get back, I hope you are satisfied!

Kisses!!!!

Oh, and if I haven't told you lately, I love you.

Picture update

2008-10-19T08:22:00.008-05:00

Husband downloaded some pictures (finally-sheesh) so I thought I'd post some to share.

Here is the pot roast that I successfully made

And the cinnamon rolls

One slow Sunday afternoon we had this floating in our backyard

Here are the pretty flowers that I planted in the front of the house and had to yank out of the ground to plant the tulip bulbs. That was a little more difficult than I thought it was going to be. They were doing so well!

One weekend we ventured out to a MN Apple Orchard. It was such a great warm fall day. Sunny and 75. The fall colors on the tree's were amazing. Everything was perfect minus the ladybug community that decided to reproduce in large quantities and bite. Not cool.

That same weekend, French Kitty went out on the deck, forgot where the door was, and tried to get back in thru the window.

You can always check out my flickr! photos. I try and update that site as well. Just click on What is this? on the badge to the left and then click on Super8080 to see some fun photos.

Later gators.

What did you say?

2008-10-17T11:35:00.004-05:00

The following are things that have either been said to me or overheard by me at work. With no exaggeration what so ever.

Enjoy.

I gave you a purple sucker yesterday.
What can I say...I'm an anal guy.
It's your turn for me to do you.
It is brown and moist. With white chunks in it.
I must have been playing with my unit.
I need something to suck on.
If the hole isn't big enough you just have to force it in.
Boss: Your sister kept accusing me of starring at her boobs at your wedding.
Me: That's because you were.
Boss: Oh.

Bear in mind that I'm taking these things completely out of context on some of them, but it's still amazing.

Have a good weekend friends.

It has to be said...again

2008-10-15T13:00:00.004-05:00

Today is a very special day.

Today is someone's birthday.

That special someone has made me realize how important life is.

He is someone who makes me smile.

Someone who tells me I look beautiful even when I know I don't.

Someone who says 'This is the best chicken and cheese hotdish I've ever tasted' even though the rice is undercooked and there is too much cheese and mushy vegetables.

Someone who truly truly truly believes in the golden rule.

Someone, who in his short (now) 8 years, has a heart of gold.

Happy Birthday Super Kid.

You are one in a million.

Ah screw it

2008-10-05T09:01:00.004-05:00

Here are the WOM selections for August and September (husband has yet to download my ultra cool pictures from the camera to the computer and I'm afraid if I wait any longer I'll completely space which one's I want to talk about and have a 2 year old esk melt down)(why don't I just download them myself you ask? because husband is a computer engineer and I would undoubtedly screw something up if I tried it myself):
Smoking Loon. It is deeeeeelious. We had an endless supply up at our Madden's weekend vacation. I had the Merlot (weird, I know but it was good) and the Chardonnay. Worried that this brand was exclusive to the resort, we stocked up while we were there thinking that 12 bucks wasn't so bad for yummy wine. Well low and behold the next time I was cruising around Sam's Club I found they had it there. For 6 bucks. *sigh*
I know we are already into October (what the fuck) so I try and be more on the ball with these things.
Drink up sisters.
Chow!

Your my Hero

2008-10-04T07:49:00.006-05:00

Dear Kathy,

Your my hero. Your show last night was absolutely hilarious. I've never laughed so hard for so long. Your bit about Sarah Palin and shushing people in movie theaters was off the charts funny. I have now put you on the list of people I love. Which is sorta weird because we've never met, but I don't care, I love you.

The only things I would slightly change about the night, would be that my sister in VT had a go-go gadget copter so she could have been there with me to see it. I thought about her almost the whole time and thought how much she would love you too after seeing the show. I must ask that you make a pit stop in Burlington VT and do a show there so she can see you live because my dreams of materializing a go-go gadget copter are pretty out there. Thanks.

Although your bit about celebrity baby names, stemming from the weird names that Sarah Palin gave her kids, was funny, the girl I went with has the same name as Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes' little girl (spelled different but pronounced the same). I sorta felt bad for her because you went off about how odd that name is and it caused for an uncomfortable moment when I glanced over at her out of the corner of my eye. She looked pretty miffed. (It was funny though I just didn't laugh because she was sitting right next to me and I barely know the girl, but I really wanted to).

Remember mama loves you and the next time you swoop into Minneapolis, I am going to buy two tickets and drag my husband with me, just so he can see how funny you are and because your bj joke at the beginning will only be funny coming from you.

A huge fan in the Minneapolis,

Super

It has to be said...

2008-09-28T07:57:00.001-05:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY HUSBAND!

Running is hard

2008-09-27T08:47:00.003-05:00

So, I started this 8 week program to 'Run effortlessly and with ease' thing. I have graduated to week 3 recently and suddenly things are rather difficult.

The past two times I've been out, I hated it. Sorry, rather strong words for something so new to me, but I can't help but hate life while running. I'm not running effortlessly or with ease. It's more like I am a two ton elephant and every step is not breezy and airy, it's more like a stomp. Followed by another stomp. I don't even think I'm going that fast. I try to keep a good pace without over doing it, but I want to get a good workout in and feel like I need to at least jog faster than I would walk.

I start out the run with a positive attitude, thinking 'this is going to be great' and by the time I get home, my attitude stinks (as well as my feet).

Anywho, I know there are at least a couple of veteran runners who read this lowly blog, so do you have any advice for me? I really want to do this, so I think that is half the battle, but any encouraging words would be much appreciated.

Oh-I have not forgotten about my WOM selections for August or September, I am just waiting for husband to down load some super rad pictures I took of the selections. I know you are all waiting on pins and needles for my advice on semi-decent cheapy wine, so I promise I will post soon about it.

She shoots She SCORES!!!

2008-09-20T18:38:00.005-05:00

Well, technically I didn't really do much to SCORE A TICKET to see this lady on October 3rd for one of her comedy shows, but I do have a ticket none the less! WHOOP WHOOP! I am beyond excited to see her show. I love love love My Life on the D List so to see her in concert is going to be great. It is actually a funny story how I came to get the ticket in the first place. Last week, Husband sent me an e-mail, it said 'so do you maybe want to go to this concert thingy?...' It didn't register with me right away so I replied 'What is it and where?' Only after I sent that reply did I scroll down to see an attached e-mail from one of husbands' co-workers saying that she had to sell her ticket because of some family obligations and maybe I would want it? Umm...let's think together...YES. I quickly replied back 'YES TAKE THE TICKET I WANT IT I'M SHAKING TAKE THE F**KING TICKET' K, maybe I exaggerate but you get the gist. So I now am the official owner of one ticket, the other person she was going to go with I sorta kinda know but not really 'cause who really cares I'm going. Jealous?

Also, last week, I went to see Family Groove Company in concert, here's a little sampling of their music. And a little some thing extra. Heeheeheeheheee...

They are excellent in concert. I highly highly highly suggest going to one of their shows. I'm so proud to say I'm related to one of the band members.

Later bitches!

Clues you have been sitting in front of your computer too long

2008-09-13T18:03:00.004-05:00

Your wine glass is empty.

& your butt is throbbing, and not in a good way.

The End.

Why Super Kid is so great.

2008-09-11T18:23:00.004-05:00

So I thought I would elaborate just a little as to why I think my Super Kid is the best.

I am semi-serious about training for this 5k deal in a couple of weeks and have been walking/jogging lately. A couple of days ago, it was nice out and my allergies were under control so me an Super Kid went out. Him on his scooter and me trudging along.

I usually walk around the neighborhood in the same loop and have done so with Super Kid many times. I uneducatedly think it's about 2 miles. But I'm probably way off. No matter, we do this loop a lot.

We get about half way, my face is beat red and sweaty even though I'm jogging at a snails pace, and Super Kid looks over and says 'Mom, you look very beautiful today'. I know. Priceless isn't it?

Another 10 minutes pass and we are on the home stretch. Now I'm breathing rather heavily and say 'I think we need to stop'. Super Kid then offers me his Hot Wheels scooter and even goes as far to say that he will put it up on the highest handle bar setting so I don't have to hunch over. Yeah, I know again.

So just in case you were wondering why I gave props to the little guy on TIHLSWLS, this is why.

On an unrelated note, KC, this is the song I wanted you to hear. Mama likes. Which is strange because nothing this 'artist' has done before has really been that appealing to me.

Enjoy.

TIHLSWLS

2008-09-10T18:14:00.004-05:00

I have mad plumbing skillz.
I have the best kid on the planet.
Acquiring phone paparazzi talent is not difficult when you work 2 blocks from the Vikings training center.
I also have no idea why I care so much.
Me and husband speak the same love language.
Super Kid has obtained husbands fashion sense.
Customizing the Google homepage was way more fun than I thought it was going to be.
Doing this at work is a no-no.
I don't understand Facebook.
I can't keep track of all my 'I'm sure I'll remember that' user names and passwords.
Tom Brady is nursing a major boo-boo.
I wish I was that boo-boo.
I mega heart Tom Brady.
I mega hate pollen.
My feet stink, like real bad.

This is for you

2008-09-02T17:10:00.002-05:00

Just call me Betty. Betty Crocker.

2008-09-02T16:49:00.003-05:00

Ehm! Attention!

I, Mrs-All-I-Know-How-to-make-is-Microwave-Popcorn, has done the unthinkable. Braved new ground. Unmasked a new hidden talent.

I have made two things in the same day, without failure.

Drum roll please.

The first dish I made was

POT ROAST!

Ahhhhhhh, I can't believe I made this and it turned out no less. Most people know it's not very difficult to make pot roast, but usually when recipe's are explained to me and there is a 'and then all's you have to do is' I get eye glazed and start tasting copper so for me to do this, well Bravo to me. It was even good to eat. I even ate some WITHOUT dousing it in a gallon of ketchup. I EVEN got a huge thumbs up from husband and super kid, without asking thank you very much.

K, the second thing I made yesterday was a nail biter indeed. It is a made from scratch recipe handed down about 4 generations on husbands side (no pressure).

2nd drum roll please.

Cinnamon rolls. Yes, cinnamon rolls from scratch. Meaning I made the dough. From scratch. Yes, me. I did it. Again, most people know that these things are easy peasy to make, but I did it. I undercooked one batch by a little bit but I hear that is the trickiest part.

So, anytime you want me to whip up a batch at your next party function, you just let me know, I will with a smile on my face.

Bravo to me!

I took some pictures of my own in the process, I'll post them some other time.

You really should

2008-08-28T20:00:00.001-05:00

Go to 1,000 Awesome Things (link is to the left) and read #951.
I'm still laughing.
Mad props to this blog posting for making my icky night un-icky.

Sorry Mom

2008-08-28T15:51:00.005-05:00

I went to the dentist for my check up and guess what he told me?

Although not exactly necessary, I should look into getting these back on my front row. Seems as though after years of not wearing my retainer, Mr and Mrs Teeth Numbers 7 & 8 are shifting.

Although most of what dear old Mommy has done for me over years goes unnoticed and under appreciated, I must now take a moment to say two things to her. 1) I should've listened to you when you said "you better wear that retainer---all that money---sigh" and 2) I'm sorry.

Why I didn't make the US Olympic Diving Team

2008-08-22T21:36:00.003-05:00

I am afraid of heights.
My squishy gut got in the way.
I got lost on the way to the finals.
When I say 'I got lost' it means I was watching Lost.
I love Lost.
They don't allow drinking cheapy wine.
It interfered with my Internet time.
I was copying something for the billionth time for somebody who could've done it themselves.
I was too old.
My arms were too flabby.
I drooled too much around Michael Phelps.
I spaced it.
I was busy making a Minnesota Tummy Warmer.
I couldn't find a nice swimsuit.
I was cold.
Blogger was doing weird formatting things.

Hi Pretty!

2008-08-22T20:20:00.003-05:00

That's just rude

2008-08-20T07:45:00.003-05:00

So yesterday I went to a really big chain pet store. I can't remember the last time I was in one,

I'm almost positive it was in OR visiting Sister when super smart nephew wanted to buy something for his rabbit. Or maybe it was his hamster. I don't know, anyway, it was probably about 3 years ago that I entered one. We usually get french kitties food at the Target because it's just more convenient, so again, no reason to go there.

Moving along, yesterday I went there because a co-worker, who has a fish tank in his office, went on vacation this week and forgot to buy more food for his fish. He called and asked if I could go get some and feed them this week. No problem I say. I needed to go out on my lunch break anyway to do some other errands.

I go there, find the food and discover that there is one register open with about 6 people waiting in line. The cashier lady kept calling for back up but she was really hard to understand so I'm guessing that's why nobody rushed to her aid. I'm the last one in line and think oh well, I guess I'll just space out. I'm really good at that. The line is not moving because customer number one had like a zillion questions about her dog food that the cashier was indeed answering, just not very clearly so there was a lot of 'what was that?' 'huh?' and 'can you say that again'. I was STILL IN LINE mind you but looking at a display about 10 feet to my right about dog training classes when the line moved, just a little. And then it happened. I was butted. Some lady, who I am sure seen me, just slid right in line in front of me. It was really strange. I just looked at the back of her head, sortof in disbelief, because how often do you get butted in front of? Isn't it the cardinal rule starting in like 2nd grade to never butt in front of someone?

So I'm standing there, wondering if I should say something, but can't really think of anything to say without sounding like a...well...2nd grader. So I say nothing and just remember that karma is a bitch. And then you know what happened? The back up cashier shows up, taps the butter lady on the shoulder and says 'Ma'am, I can help you over here.' WHAT???? I am the last one in line, wasn't she supposed to tap me on the shoulder?

On a brighter note, mama loves you.

Pictures!

2008-08-18T17:53:00.021-05:00

Here are some (okay a lot) of pictures from our mini-vaca at Maddens.

Somebody didn't want us to go. Or maybe he just really wanted to come with :)

We had to take this bridge from our room (which was fucking amazing for realsies it was massive and totally unexpected) to the dining lodge where we had all meals ready and waiting for us to eat. I am a HUGE fan of breakfast food and the buffet they had set up each morning was so delicious. Pancakes, waffles, french toast, TOAST, sausage, yogurt, parfaits!, oh my I was in Heaven.

For lunch they had burgers, hot dogs, samiches, chips, stuff like that.

For dinners, they had yummy walleye (not as good as yours Dad), steak, potatoes, chicken, asparagus, and the greatest desserts.

This was our view from our room. Every morning, of course at the crack of dawn, I would wake up and go to sleep with this. I'm a huge fan of pictures like this. I guess it's because nobody can ever be there at that moment with me and feel the absolute genuine happiness I felt when this picture was taken. It's happening right in front of you and nobody will ever see this exact moment ever again. Sappy, yes. Truthful, even more so.

I don't know what person thought of making a enormous lawn chair, but props to them for being genius enough to make me feel like a kid again. I don't know if this picture does it justice, but its HUGE. Like elephant huge. I climbed up on it and immediately felt like a five year old. Totally worth it.

I usually don't see husband this happy. In fact, other than our wedding day, I don't think I've ever seen him his this happy. We rented a boat for the day and tooled around on the lake for the entire day. He was just so happy. It makes me a little weepy just thinking about his face and the happiness spread across it. He even woke up when I did that morning. Just so happy to start the day. On the boat. We went swimming and saw a bunch of really fantastic things. Side note: while we were in a cove, me and Super Kid's song from the wedding came on (I'll stand by You) and I had a little melt down because I knew super kid would love to be there. Anyway...on to more of our boat adventure.

Of course I had to drive it, too.

And then I had to do something extremely cool in mid air (work with me here) to prove my awesomeness.

After all that excitement, Husband of the Year surprised me with a rosemary mint body wrap with foot and scalp massage. For those of you who don't know me, I LOOOOOOOOOVE anything mint. It could be a mint toothpick, rock or pair of socks. I would love it all the same. I even had mint cake at my wedding because I narrow mindedly thought that everyone likes mint. Anyway, the wrap was wonderful. How much better can it get than being exfoliated, rubbed down in mint wonderful, and then having 10 layers of warm blankie wraped around you. To quote my friend of all friends: I puffy heart husbands, mint and Aveda wraps. (Another note: I had a picture of the spa sign, but apparently my computer and blogger hated each other this moment so I after 3 attempts I gave up, oh well).

See what I mean about wanting to take pictures of what was happening right in front me? Brilliant!

Ahhhhhhhh

2008-08-17T19:06:00.002-05:00

Husband and I just got back from a fantastic weekend at Madden's (courtesy of husbands work). It was so great, really, I'm talking like break-thru type happiness here.

Check out the website for now.

I will be posting pictures later tonight, I can't wait for you to see them.