So apparently there are a few things going on in this world that everyone but me seemingly knows about. I really think for a good portion of my time here on earth has been spent living under a very large and dark rock. Or maybe I space out so much, that I just miss these tidbits of wisdom. Whatever the case, I will share with you a few things that were truly amazing to me when I found out, so much that I shared the news, only then to feel like a complete dope because I got the now customary 'ummmm yea....didn't you know that?' comment.
For 31 years, I was unaware of these truths:
- You can eat dandelions. Yea, believe me it's true. You can just pluck those little buggers right out of the ground and start chomping away like a goat. Amazing, no? And you know what else? You can make wine out of them. The recipe isn't even that difficult. If husband wasn't so meticulous about our yard looking pretty, I would do it, but I can't because even if one thinks about sprouting in our yard, it is properly disposed of before I can get to it.
- There is some strange phenom going on with Dust Off and teenagers. It really is the oddest thing I've ever seen. Kids are sucking in the frozen air from Dust Off keyboard/car cleaner and getting high for a few minutes. Off of office supplies. It is such a huge deal, that they even have a little picture on the can with a circle slash thru it of some person with the can up to his mouth. I asked a couple of people at work if they've ever heard of it, and guess what, they have!!! WTF? Why don't they just muster up ten bucks and buy a dime bag like I did...oops...I mean...drugs are bad.
- Only ducks that are female are called Ducks. The male species has a different name.
- Marriage is hard. How come nobody admits/tells you this? Or maybe they have, and I just filtered it out because I wasn't. Whew! Let me tell you now, it's very challenging!
- If you eat a lot of junk food, you get chubby. I'm guessing there are some people that know this, but it never happened to me, so I never cared. Guess I should have paid more attention.
Hopefully these nuggets of knowledge will save you from an awkward moment or two.
Bless you and the horse you rode in on.
1 comment:
Here is another--
The gender of a duck (or any organism) doesn't make it a different species--just a different gender.
That fact that males (drakes) and females (ducks) of any organism that inter-breed is one of many parameters that constitutes a species.
Sorry, but I am a scientist that specializes in genetic variation :)
PS--if you can't buy much pot for 10 bucks!
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